Suetonius: DE VITIS CAESARUM

[1] Germanicus, C. Caesaris pater, Drusi et minoris Antoniae filius, a Tiberio patruo adoptatus, quaesturam quinquennio ante quam per leges liceret et post eam consulatum statim gessit, missusque ad exercitum in Germaniam, excessu Augusti nuntiato, legiones universas imperatorem Tiberium pertinacissime recusantis et sibi summam rei p. deferentis incertum pietate an constantia maiore compescuit atque hoste mox devicto triumphavit. Consul deinde iterum creatus ac prius quam honorem iniret ad componendum Orientis statum expulsus, cum Armeniae regem devicisset, Cappadociam in provinciae formam redegisset, annum agens aetatis quartum et tricensimum diuturno morbo Antiochiae obiit, non sine veneni suspicione. Nam praeter livores, qui toto corpore erant, et spumas, quae per os fluebant, cremati quoque cor inter ossa incorruptum repertum est, cuius ea natura existimatur, ut tinctum veneno igne confici nequeat.

[1] Germanicus, father of C. Caesar, son of Drusus and the younger Antonia, adopted by his uncle Tiberius, carried the quaestorship five years before the law allowed and immediately thereafter the consulship; and, having been sent to the army in Germania, on the announcement of Augustus’s death he restrained all the legions, which were most stubbornly refusing the commander Tiberius and were conferring the supreme power upon himself, by a restraint uncertain whether greater in pietas or in constancy, and with the enemy soon afterward defeated he celebrated a triumph. Then created consul a second time and, before he could enter upon the office, expelled on a mission to settle the condition of the East, after he had defeated the king of Armenia and reduced Cappadocia to the form of a province, in the thirty‑fourth year of his age he died at Antioch of a long disease, not without suspicion of poison. For besides the livid marks that were on his whole body and the foams that flowed through his mouth, a heart found cremated yet uncorrupted among the bones was judged of such a nature that, having been steeped in poison, it could not be consumed by fire.

[2] Obiit autem, ut opinio fuit, fraude Tiberi, ministerio et opera Cn. Pisonis, qui sub idem tempus Syriae praepositus, nec dissimulans offendendum sibi aut patrem aut filium, quasi plane ita necesse esset, etiam aegrum Germanicum gravissimis verborum ac rerum acerbitatibus nullo adhibito modo adfecit; propter quae, ut Romam rediit, paene discerptus a populo, a senatu capitis damnatus est.

[2] He died, however, as was the common opinion, by the fraud of Tiberius, by the agency and works of Gnaeus Piso, who at the same time was appointed over Syria, and, not hiding that either the father or the son should be offended at him, as if plainly it were necessary, even when Germanicus was ill afflicted him with the gravest bitternesses of words and deeds, in no way holding back; on account of which, when he returned to Rome, he was almost torn to pieces by the people, and by the senate condemned to death.

[3] Omnes Germanico corporis animique virtutes, et quantas nemini cuiquam, contigisse satis constat: formam et fortitudinem egregiam, ingenium in utroque eloquentiae doctrinaeque genere praecellens, benivolentiam singularem conciliandaeque hominum gratiae ac promerendi amoris mirum et efficax studium. Formae minus congruebat gracilitas crurum, sed ea quoque paulatim repleta assidua equi vectatione post cibum. Hostem comminus saepe percussit.

[3] All the virtues of body and mind were bestowed on Germanicus, and how many—more than on anyone else—is sufficiently certain: an outstanding form and fortitude, a genius excelling in both eloquence and learning, a singular benevolence and a wondrous and effective zeal for conciliating men's favour and for winning love. To his appearance less congruous was the slenderness of his legs, but these too were gradually filled out by constant riding on horseback after meals. He often struck the enemy at close quarters.

Oravit causas etiam triumphalis; atque inter cetera studiorum monimenta reliquit et comoedias Graecas. Domi forisque civilis, libera ac foederata oppida sine lictoribus adibat. Sicubi clarorum virorum sepulcra cognosceret, inferias Manibus dabat.

He also pleaded causes of the triumphal; and among other monuments of his studies he left behind Greek comedies. At home and abroad he frequented civic, free, and federate towns without lictors. Wherever he recognized the tombs of renowned men, he paid funeral offerings to the Manes.

Caesorum clade Variana veteres ac dispersas reliquias uno tumulo humaturus, colligere sua manu et comportare primus adgressus est. Obtrectatoribus etiam, qualescumque et quantacumque de causa nanctus esset, lenis adeo et innoxius, ut Pisoni decreta sua rescindenti, clientelas divexanti non prius suscensere in animum induxerit, quam veneficiis quoque et devotionibus impugnari se comperisset; ac ne tunc quidem ultra progressus, quam ut amicitiam ei more maiorum renuntiaret mandaretque domesticis ultionem, si quid sibi accideret.

About to inter in one tumulus the ancient and scattered remains from the Varian disaster of the Caesars, he undertook to gather them with his own hand and to be the first to carry them together. Even toward detractors, whatever and of whatever cause they had gained, he was so mild and harmless that, when Piso was annulling his decrees and scattering his clientelae, he did not harbor resentment in his mind until he had learned that he was also being attacked by veneficia and devotiones; and even then he did not go farther than to renounce friendship with him according to the custom of the maiores and to order his household to take vengeance should anything befall him.

[4] Quarum virtutum fructum uberrimum tulit, sic probatus et dilectus a suis, ut Augustus – omitto enim necessitudines reliquas – diu cunctatus an sibi successorem destinaret, adoptandum Tiberio dederit; sic vulgo favorabilis, ut plurimi tradant, quotiens aliquo adveniret vel sicunde discederet, prae turba occurrentium prosequentiumve nonnumquam eum discrimen vitae adisse, e Germania vero post compressam seditionem revertenti praetorianas cohortes universas prodisse obviam, quamvis pronuntiatum esset, ut duae tantum modo exirent, populi autem Romani sexum, aetatem, ordinem omnem usque ad vicesimum lapidem effudisse se.

[4] He reaped the most abundant fruit of those virtues, so proven and beloved by his own, that Augustus — for I omit the remaining ties of kinship — long hesitated whether to appoint a successor to himself, and gave Tiberius to be adopted; so generally popular, as very many relate, that whenever he arrived anywhere or departed thence, before the throng of those running out to meet or to accompany him, sometimes the crisis of life was at hand for him; and indeed, returning from Germany after the sedition had been suppressed, all the praetorian cohorts came forth to meet him, although it had been proclaimed that only two should go out, and the Roman people of every sex, age, and rank poured forth even as far as the twentieth milestone.

[5] Tamen longe maiora et firmiora de eo iudicia in morte ac post mortem exstiterunt. Quo defunctus est die, lapidata sunt templa, subversae deum arae, Lares a quibusdam familiares in publicum abiecti, partus coniugum expositi. Quin et barbaros ferunt, quibus intestinum quibusque adversus nos bellum esset, velut in domestico communique maerore consensisse ad indutias; regulos quosdam barbam posuisse et uxorum capita rasisse ad indicium maximi luctus; regum etiam regem et exercitatione venandi et convictu megistanum abstinuisse, quod apud Parthos iusti[ti] instar est.

[5] Yet far greater and firmer judgments about him arose in death and after death. On the day on which he died, temples were pelted with stones, the altars of the gods were overthrown, the household Lares by some were cast out into the public, and the births of wives were exposed. Moreover they report that even the barbarians, whether the war against us was internal or external, as if by domestic and common sorrow agreed to a truce; that certain petty kings put on beards and shaved the heads of their wives as a sign of the deepest mourning; that even the king of kings refrained from the practice of hunting and from feasting, which among the Parthians is reckoned as a sort of sign of justice.

[6] Romae quidem, cum ad primam famam valitudinis attonita et maesta civitas sequentis nuntios opperiretur, et repente iam vesperi incertis auctoribus convaluisse tandem percrebruisset, passim cum luminibus et victimis in Capitolium concursum est ac paene revolsae templi fores, ne quid gestientis vota reddere moraretur, expergefactus e somno Tiberius gratulantium vocibus atque undique concinentium:

[6] In Rome, indeed, when the city, astonished and sorrowful at the first rumor of his health, awaited the following messengers, and suddenly, already at evening, it had been widely reported by uncertain authors that he had at last recovered, there was everywhere a running together to the Capitol with lights and sacrifices, and the temple doors were almost torn down, lest anything delay the rendering of the vows of those eager; Tiberius, roused from sleep by the voices of those congratulating and the singers from all sides:

Et ut demum fato functum palam factum est, non solaciis ullis, non edictis inhiberi luctus publicus potuit duravitque etiam per festos Decembris mensis dies. Auxit gloriam desideriumque defuncti et atrocitas insequentium temporum, cunctis nec temere opinantibus reverentia eius ac metu repressam Tiberi saevitiam, quae mox eruperit.

Et when at last it was made plain that he had succumbed to fate, the public mourning could not be staved off by any consolations nor by edicts, and endured even through the festival days of the month of December. The glory and the longing for the deceased increased, and the atrocity of the times to come, with all, not rashly suspecting, his reverence and Tiberius’s savagery, repressed by fear, which soon burst forth.

[7] Habuit in matrimonio Agrippinam, M. Agrippae et Iuliae filiam, et ex ea novem liberos tulit: quorum duo infantes adhuc rapti, unus iam puerascens insigni festivitate, cuius effigiem habitu Cupidinis in aede Capitolinae Veneris Livia dedicavit, Augustus in cubiculo suo positam, quotiensque introiret, exosculabatur; ceteri superstites patri fuerunt, tres sexus feminini, Agrippina, Drusilla, Livilla, continuo triennio natae; totidem mares, Nero et Drusus et C. Caesar. Neronem et Drusum senatus Tiberio criminante hostes iudicavit.

[7] He had in marriage Agrippina, daughter of M. Agrippa and Julia, and by her bore nine children: of whom two were taken away while still infants, one already a boy notable for his festive spirit, whose likeness in the habit of Cupid Livia dedicated in the temple of Capitoline Venus, Augustus placed in his bedchamber and whenever he entered kissed; the remaining survivors were for their father three of the female sex, Agrippina, Drusilla, Livilla, born in three successive years; as many males, Nero and Drusus and C. Caesar. The senate, with Tiberius accusing them, declared Nero and Drusus enemies.

[8] C. Caesar natus est pridie Kal. Sept. patre suo et C. Fonteio Capitone coss.

[8] Gaius Caesar was born on the day before the Kalends of September, his father and C. Fonteius Capito being consuls.

Ubi natus sit, incertum diversitas tradentium facit. Cn. Lentulus Gaetulicus Tiburi genitum scribit, Plinius Secundus in Treveris vico Ambitarvio supra Confluentes; addit etiam pro argumento aras ibi ostendi inscriptas OB AGRIPPINAE PVERPERIVM. Versiculi imperante mox eo divulgati apud hibernas legiones procreatum indicant:

Where he was born is uncertain, the diversity of those handing it down makes so. Cn. Lentulus Gaetulicus writes that he was born at Tibur; Pliny the Younger places him at Treveris in the village Ambitarvius above the Confluentes; he even adds as evidence that there are shown there altars inscribed OB AGRIPPINAE PVERPERIVM ("ON ACCOUNT OF AGRIPPINA'S CHILDBIRTH"). Short verses, soon circulated there with him ruling, report among the winter camps of the legions that he was begotten:

Ego in actis Anti editum invenio. Gaetulicum refellit Plinius quasi mentitum per adulationem, ut ad laudes iuvenis gloriosique principis aliquid etiam ex urbe Herculi sacra sumeret, abusumque audentius mendacio, quod ante annum fere natus Germanico filius Tiburi fuerat, appellatus et ipse C. Caesar, de cuius amabili pueritia immaturoque obitu supra diximus. Plinium arguit ratio temporum.

I find it printed in the Acts of Anti. Pliny rebuts Gaetulicus, as if he had lied by adulation, so that he might take something even from the sacred rites of the city of Hercules to the praise of the young and glorious prince; and he charges the bolder abuse with a falsehood, namely that about a year before Germanicus was born a son had been born at Tibur, also called C. Caesar, concerning whose amiable childhood and untimely death we have spoken above. The reckoning of times refutes Pliny.

Nam qui res Augusti memoriae mandarunt, Germanicum exacto consulatu in Galliam missum consentiunt iam nato Gaio. Nec Plini opinionem inscriptio arae quicquam adiuverit, cum Agrippina bis in ea regione filias enixa sit, et qualiscumque partus sine ullo sexus discrimine puerperium vocetur, quod antiqui etiam puellas pueras, sicut et pueros puellos dictitarent. Exstat et Augusti epistula, ante paucos quam obiret menses ad Agrippinam neptem ita scripta de Gaio hoc – neque enim quisquam iam alius infans nomine pari tunc supererat –: "puerum Gaium XV. Kal.

For those who committed the matters of Augustus to memory agree that Germanicus, sent into Gaul after his consulship was completed, was already born to Gaius. Nor does the inscription on the altar aid Pliny’s opinion, since Agrippina there bore daughters twice in that region, and of whatever kind a birth is, without any distinction of sex it is called puerperium, for the ancients also used to call girls puerae just as they called boys puelli. There also stands a letter of Augustus, written to Agrippina his granddaughter a few months before he died, thus concerning Gaius — for no other infant by that same name then survived —: "the boy Gaius, 15. Kal.

Iun. si dii volent, ut ducerent Talarius et Asillius, heri cum iis constitui. Mitto praeterea cum eo ex servis meis medicum, quem scripsi Germanico si vellet ut retineret.

Iun. if the gods are willing, that Talarius and Asillius should be led, yesterday I was appointed with them.
I send moreover with him from my slaves a physician, whom I wrote to Germanicus that, if he wished, he might retain.

Valebis, mea Agrippina, et dabis operam ut valens pervenias ad Germanicum tuum."

Be well, my Agrippina, and do your utmost to reach your Germanicus in good health."

Abunde parere arbitror non potuisse ibi nasci Gaium, quo prope bimulus demum perductus ab urbe sit. Versiculorum quoque fidem eadem haec elevant et eo facilius, quod ii sine auctore sunt. Sequenda est igitur, quae sola [auctor] restat et publici instrumenti auctoritas, praesertim cum Gaius Antium omnibus semper locis atque secessibus praelatum non aliter quam natale solum dilexerit tradaturque etiam sedem ac domicilium imperii taedio urbis transferre eo destinasse.

I judge it more than probable that Gaius could not have been born there, to which place he was at last led from the city almost as a bimulus. The same facts also enhance the credibility of the little verses, and all the more easily because they are without an author. Therefore one must follow that which alone remains — [author] — and the authority of public records, especially since it is reported that Gaius ever preferred Antium to all places and retreats, loved it no otherwise than his native soil, and even intended to transfer the seat and dwelling of the empire thither out of weariness of the city.

[9] Caligulae cognomen castrensi ioco traxit, quia manipulario habitu inter milites educabatur. Apud quos quantum praeterea per hanc nutrimentorum consuetudinem amore et gratia valuerit, maxime cognitum est, cum post excessum Augusti tumultuantis et in furorem usque praecipites solus haud dubie ex conspectu suo flexit. Non enim prius destiterunt, quam ablegari eum ob seditionis periculum et in proximam civitatem demandari animadvertissent; tunc demum ad paenitentiam versi reprenso ac retento vehiculo invidiam quae sibi fieret deprecati sunt.

[9] He drew the surname Caligula from a camp jest, because he was reared among the soldiers in manipular dress. How much moreover by this custom of nourishment he prevailed in love and favour among them is very well known, since after Augustus' death, when they were tumultuous and even headlong into frenzy, he alone without doubt turned them from rushing from his sight. For they did not desist until they perceived that he was to be sent away on account of the danger of sedition and to be committed to the nearest town; then at last, turned to repentance, having seized and detained the vehicle, they begged that the enmity being shown him be averted.

[10] Comitatus est patrem et Syriaca expeditione. Unde reversus primum in matris, deinde ea relegata in Liviae Augustae proaviae suae contubernio mansit; quam defunctam praetextatus etiam tunc pro rostris laudavit. Transitque ad Antoniam aviam et undevicensimo aetatis anno accitus Capreas a Tiberio uno atque eodem die togam sumpsit barbamque posuit, sine ullo honore qualis contigerat tirocinio fratrum eius.

[10] He accompanied his father on the Syrian expedition. Whence, having returned, he first remained in his mother's household, then, she being relegated, in the contubernium of Livia Augusta, his great-grandmother; when she died he, still praetextatus, even then praised her at the rostra. He passed to Antonia, his grandmother, and in the 19th year of his age, summoned to Capri by Tiberius, on one and the same day he took the toga and laid aside his beard, without any honour such as had befallen in the tirocinio of his brothers.

Hic omnibus insidiis temptatus elicientium cogentiumque se ad querelas nullam umquam occasionem dedit, perinde obliterato suorum casu ac si nihil cuiquam accidisset, quae vero ipse pateretur incredibili dissimulatione transmittens tantique in avum et qui iuxta erant obsequii, ut non immerito sit dictum nec servum meliorem ullum nec deteriorem dominum fuisse.

Here, tried by all the snares of those enticing and compelling him to complaints, he never gave any occasion for them, as if the fate of his own had been entirely blotted out and as if nothing had happened to anyone; which things he himself endured, however, he passed over with incredible dissimulation, and with so great a deference to his grandfather and to those who stood near him, that it is not undeservedly said he was neither any slave the better nor any master the worse.

[11] Naturam tamen saevam atque probrosam ne tunc quidem inhibere poterat, quin et animadversionibus poenisque ad supplicium datorum cupidissime interesset et ganeas atque adulteria capillamento celatus et veste longa noctibus obiret ac scaenicas saltandi canendique artes studiosissime appeteret, facile id sane Tiberio patiente, si per has mansuefieri posset ferum eius ingenium. Quod sagacissimus senex ita prorsus perspexerat, ut aliquotiens praedicaret exitio suo omniumque Gaium vivere et se natricem populo Romano, Phaethontem orbi terrarum educare.

[11] Nature, however, cruel and shameful, not even then could be restrained, so that he most eagerly took part in the punishments and punishments of those delivered to execution, and, concealed by his hair and a long robe, by night frequented brothels and adulteries and most industriously pursued the stage arts of dancing and singing — this certainly easily with Tiberius being patient, if by these things his savage disposition could be tamed. Which the very sagacious old man had so thoroughly perceived that he often foretold that all the Gaii would live to his ruin, and that he himself would rear for the Roman people a stepmother and a Phaethon for the world.

[12] Non ita multo post Iuniam Claudillam M. Silani nobilissimi viri filiam duxit uxorem. Deinde augur in locum fratris sui Drusi destinatus, prius quam inauguraretur ad pontificatum traductus est insigni testimonio pietatis atque indolis, cum deserta desolataque reliquis subsidiis aula, Seiano hoste suspecto mox et oppresso, ad spem successionis paulatim admoveretur. Quam quo magis confirmaret, amissa Iunia ex partu Enniam Naeviam, Macronis uxorem, qui tum praetorianis cohortibus praeerat, sollicitavit ad stuprum, pollicitus et matrimonium suum, si potitus imperio fuisset; deque ea re et iure iurando et chirographo cavit.

[12] Not long after he took as wife Iunia Claudilla, daughter of M. Silanus, a most noble man. Then, appointed augur in place of his brother Drusus, before he was inaugurated he was translated to the pontificate by notable testimony of piety and of character, the court being deserted and desolate and other succours withdrawn, with Sejanus suspected as an enemy and soon also oppressed, and he was gradually brought near to the hope of succession. To confirm this the more, Junia having been lost in childbirth, he solicited Ennia Naevia, wife of Macro, who then commanded the praetorian cohorts, to debauchery, promising also his marriage if he should have obtained the power; and concerning that matter he secured both by oath and by chirograph.

Per hanc insinuatus Macroni veneno Tiberium adgressus est, ut quidam opinantur, spirantique adhuc detrahi anulum et, quoniam suspicionem retinentis dabat, pulvinum iussit inici atque etiam fauces manu sua oppressit, liberto, qui ob atrocitatem facinoris exclamaverat, confestim in crucem acto. Nec abhorret a veritate, cum sint quidam auctores, ipsum postea etsi non de perfecto, at certe de cogitato quondam parricidio professum; gloriatum enim assidue in commemoranda sua pietate, ad ulciscendam necem matris et fratrum introisse se cum pugione cubiculum Tiberi[i] dormientis et misericordia correptum abiecto ferro recessisse; nec illum, quanquam sensisset, aut inquirere quicquam aut exsequi ausum.

By insinuating himself through this man, he attacked Tiberius with Macron’s poison, as some suppose, and, while he yet breathed, had his ring torn off; and, since he gave ground for suspecting he retained it, he ordered a pillow to be thrown on him and even pressed his throat with his own hand; the freedman who had cried out at the atrocity of the deed was at once led away to be crucified. Nor does this stray from the truth, for there are certain authors who relate that he himself afterwards, although not of a deed accomplished, yet certainly of a once contemplated parricide made profession; for he continually vaunted, in recounting his pietas, that to avenge the murder of his mother and brothers he had entered the sleeping Tiberi[i]’s chamber with a dagger and, seized by mercy, had withdrawn with the cast-away iron; nor, although he had perceived him, did he dare either to inquire into anything or to carry it out.

[13] Sic imperium adeptus, populum Romanum, vel dicam hominum genus, voti compotem fecit, exoptatissimus princeps maximae parti provincialium ac militum, quod infantem plerique cognoverant, sed et universae plebi urbanae ob memoriam Germanici patris miserationemque prope afflictae domus. Itaque ut a Miseno movit quamvis lugentis habitu et funus Tiberi prosequens, tamen inter altaria et victimas ardentisque taedas densissimo et laetissimo obviorum agmine incessit, super fausta nomina "sidus" et "pullum" et "pupum" et "alumnum" appellantium.

[13] Thus having attained the imperium, he made the Roman people, or shall I say the genus of men, sharers in his vow, the most-desired prince to the great part of provincials and soldiers, because most had known him as an infant, and also to the whole urban plebs, the house nearly afflicted by the memory of Germanicus the father and by pity. And so as he departed from Misenum, although in the garb of mourning and escorting the funeral of Tiberius, yet he advanced among altars and victims and burning torches with the densest and most joyful throng of those meeting him, they calling out the auspicious names "sidus" and "pullum" and "pupum" and "alumnum".

[14] Ingressoque urbem, statim consensu senatus et irrumpentis in curiam turbae, inrita Tiberi voluntate, qui testamento alterum nepotem suum praetextatum adhuc coheredem ei dederat, ius arbitriumque omnium rerum illi permissum est tanta publica laetitia, ut tribus proximis mensibus ac ne totis quidem supra centum sexaginta milia victimarum caesa tradantur.

[14] Upon entering the city, immediately by the assent of the senate and a mob bursting into the curia, nullifying Tiberius’s will — who in his testament had given another grandson, still in the praetexta, as co-heir to him — the right and discretion of all matters were granted to him with so great public rejoicing that over the next three months, and not even in the whole of them, were more than 160,000 victims slaughtered.

Cum deinde paucos post dies in proximas Campaniae insulas traiecisset, vota pro reditu suscepta sunt, ne minimam quidem occasionem quoquam omittente in testificanda sollicitudine et cura de incolumitate eius. Ut vero in adversam valitudinem incidit, pernoctantibus cunctis circa Palatium, non defuerunt qui depugnaturos se armis pro salute aegri quique capita sua titulo proposito voverent. Accessit ad immensum civium amorem notabilis etiam externorum favor.

When, after a few days, he had crossed over to the nearest islands of Campania, vows for his return were undertaken, omitting not even the smallest occasion anywhere in testifying the solicitude and care for his safety. But when he fell into an adverse illness, with all spending the night about the Palace, there were not lacking those who vowed that they would fight with arms for the safety of the sick man and who vowed their own heads as the pledged offering. To the immense love of the citizens there was added, notable, also the favor of foreigners.

Namque Artabanus Parthorum rex, odium semper contemptumque Tiberi prae se ferens, amicitiam huius ultro petiit venitque ad colloquium legati consularis et transgressus Euphraten aquilas et signa Romana Caesarumque imagines adoravit.

For Artabanus, king of the Parthians, ever bearing hatred and contempt before Tiberius, of his own accord sought this man’s friendship and came to a conference with the consular legate, and having crossed the Euphrates adored the eagles and Roman standards and the images of the Caesars.

[15] Incendebat et ipse studia hominum omni genere popularitatis. Tiberio cum plurimis lacrimis pro contione laudato funeratoque amplissime, confestim Pandateriam et Pontias ad transferendos matris fratrisque cineres festinavit, tempestate turbida, quo magis pietas emineret, adiitque venerabundus ac per semet in urnas condidit; nec minore scaena Ostiam praefixo in biremis puppe vexillo et inde Romam Tiberi subvectos per splendidissimum quemque equestris ordinis medio ac frequenti die duobus ferculis Mausoleo intulit, inferiasque is annua religione publice instituit, et eo amplius matri circenses carpentumque quo in pompa traduceretur. At in memoriam patris Septembrem mensem Germanicum appellavit.

[15] He himself also inflamed men's zeal in every kind of popularity. With very many tears, Tiberius, praised in an assembly and most magnificently buried, at once hastened to Pandateria and Pontia to transfer the ashes of his mother and brother; in stormy weather, that his piety might show the more. And reverent, he approached and placed them himself into urns; nor with a lesser display at Ostia — a bireme’s prow set before and a standard on the stern — and thence having borne them to Rome to be presented to Tiberius, he, on the most splendid of days, in the midst and throng of the equestrian order, carried them on two biers into the Mausoleum. He publicly instituted the funeral rites as an annual religion, and all the more provided for circensian games and chariots so that she might be led in procession. But in memory of his father he called the month September Germanicus.

Post haec Antoniae aviae, quidquid umquam Livia Augusta honorum cepisset, uno senatus consulto congessit; patruum Claudium, equitem R. ad id tempus, collegam sibi in consulatu assumpsit; fratrem Tiberium die virilis togae adoptavit appellavitque principem iuventutis. De sororibus auctor fuit, ut omnibus sacramentis adicerentur: "neque me liberosque meos cariores habebo quam Gaium habeo et sorores eius"; item relationibus consulum: "quod bonum felixque sit C. Caesari sororibusque eius."

After this he, to Antonia his grandmother, collected by one senatus consultum whatever honors Livia Augusta had ever taken; he assumed as his colleague in the consulship his paternal uncle Claudius, an eques Roman up to that time; he adopted his brother Tiberius on the day of the manly toga and called him princeps of the youth. Concerning the sisters he was the author that they be added to all sacramenta: "nor will I hold myself and my children dearer than I hold Gaius and his sisters"; likewise in the consuls' speeches: "may what is good and fortunate be for Gaius Caesar and his sisters."

Pari popularitate damnatos relegatosque restituit; criminum, si quae residua ex priore tempore manebant, omnium gratiam fecit; commentarios ad matris fratrumque suorum causas pertinentis, ne cui postmodum delatori aut testi maneret ullus metus, convectos in forum, et ante clare obtestatus deos neque legisse neque attigisse quicquam, concremavit; libellum de salute sua oblatum non recepit, contendens nihil sibi admissum cur cuiquam invisus esset, negavitque se delatoribus aures habere.

He restored the condemned and the exiled with equal popularity; of crimes, if any remnants from the earlier time remained, he granted clemency to all; the records pertaining to the causes of his mother and his brothers, so that no fear might remain afterward for any informant or witness, having been brought into the forum, he burned, and having plainly invoked the gods as witness that he had neither read nor touched anything; he did not receive the little petition offered concerning his safety, insisting that nothing had been granted to him for which he should be hateful to anyone, and he denied that he lent an ear to informers.

[16] Spintrias monstrosarum libidinum aegre ne profundo mergeret exoratus, urbe submovit. Titi Labieni, Cordi Cremuti, Cassi Severi scripta senatus consultis abolita requiri et esse in manibus lectitarique permisit, quando maxime sua interesset ut facta quaeque posteris tradantur. Rationes imperii ab Augusto proponi solitas sed a Tiberio intermissas publicavit.

[16] She entreated with difficulty that Spintrias, lest he be grievously plunged into the deep by monstrous libidines, be removed from the city. She permitted the writings of Titus Labienus, Cordus Cremutus, Cassius Severus—abolished by senatus consulta—to be sought out, to be in hands, and to be read aloud, when it was most to her interest that deeds and matters be handed down to posterity. She published the rationes imperii, accustomed to be proposed by Augustus but discontinued by Tiberius.

Magistratibus liberam iuris dictionem et sine sui appellatione concessit. Equites R. severe curioseque nec sine moderatione recognovit, palam adempto equo quibus aut probri aliquid aut ignominiae inesset, eorum qui minore culpa tenerentur nominibus modo in recitatione praeteritis. Ut levior labor iudicantibus foret, ad quattuor prioris quintam decuriam addidit.

He granted magistrates free jurisdiction of law and without appeal to himself. He reviewed the Equites R. severely and carefully, yet not without moderation, publicly taking away the horse from those in whom any element of reproach or ignominy existed; of those held to lesser fault he merely omitted the names in the roll-call. So that the judges’ labor might be lighter, he added a fifth decuria to the four prior.

Temptavit et comitiorum more revocato suffragia populo reddere. Legata ex testamento Tiberi quamquam abolito, sed et Iuliae Augustae, quod Tiberius suppresserat, cum fide ac sine calumnia repraesentata persolvit. Ducentesimam auctionum Italiae remisit; multis incendiorum damna supplevit; ac si quibus regna restituit, adiecit et fructum omnem vectigaliorum et reditum medii temporis, ut Antiocho Commageno sestertium milies confiscatum.

He also tried, with the comitia recalled in the customary manner, to restore the suffrages to the people. He paid legacies from wills to Tiberius, though abolished, and likewise to Julia Augusta — those which Tiberius had suppressed — when presented with good faith and without calumny. He remitted the ducentesima on auctions in Italy; made good the losses of many from fires; and if in any cases he restored kingdoms, he added also the entire fruit of the taxes and the revenue for the intervening period, as with Antiochus of Commagene, whose confiscated sesterces amounted to one million.

Quoque magis nullius non boni exempli fautor videretur, mulieri libertinae octingenta donavit, quod excruciata gravissimis tormentis de scelere patroni reticuisset. Quas ob res inter reliquos honores decretus est ei clipeus aureus, quem quotannis certo die collegia sacerdotum in Capitolium ferrent, senatu prosequente nobilibusque pueris ac puellis carmine modulato laudes virtutum eius canentibus. Decretum autem ut dies, quo cepisset imperium, Parilia vocaretur, velut argumentum rursus conditae urbis.

And so that he might seem more and more the patron of every good example, he gave a freedwoman eight hundred (units), because, having been tortured with the gravest torments, she had kept silence about her patron’s crime. For these reasons among other honors a golden clipeus was decreed to him, which each year on a fixed day the collegia of priests would carry to the Capitol, the senate escorting and noble boys and girls, with melody measured by song, singing the praises of his virtues. It was moreover decreed that the day on which he had taken up the imperium be called Parilia, as if again an argument of the city’s founding.

[17] Consulatus quattuor gessit, primum ex Kal. Iul. per duos menses, secundum ex Kal.

[17] He held the consulship four times, the first from the Kalends of July for two months, the second from the Kalends

Ian. per XXX dies, tertium usque in Idus Ian., quartum usque septimum Idus easdem. Ex omnibus duos novissimos coniunxit.

He held the consulship four times: the first from the Kalends of July for two months, the second from the Kalends of January for 30 days, the third up to the Ides of January, the fourth up to the seventh day before the same Ides. Of all these he joined the last two.

Tertium autem Luguduni iniit solus, non ut quidam opinantur superbia neglegentiave, sed quod defunctum sub Kalendarum diem collegam rescisse absens non potuerat. Congiarium populo bis dedit trecenos sestertios, totiens abundantissimum epulum senatui equestrique ordini, etiam coniugibus ac liberis utrorumque; posteriore epulo forensia insuper viris, feminis ac pueris fascias purpurae ac conchylii distribuit. Et ut laetitiam publicam in perpetuum quoque augeret, adiecit diem Saturnalibus appellavitque Iuvenalem.

He, however, entered Lugdunum for the third time alone, not, as some suppose, from pride or negligence, but because his colleague, having died on the Kalends’ day, could not, while absent, be interred. He gave the congiarium to the people twice—300 sestertii each time—and as often an abundant banquet to the senate and equestrian order, even to the wives and children of both; at the later banquet he moreover distributed, besides the forensia, bands of purple and of shell to men, women, and boys. And, that he might also increase the public rejoicing forever, he added a day to the Saturnalia and called it Juvenalis.

[18] Munera gladiatoria partim in amphitheatro Tauri partim in Saeptis aliquot edidit, quibus inseruit catervas Afrorum Campanorumque pugilum ex utraque regione electissimorum. Neque spectaculis semper ipse praesedit, sed interdum aut magistratibus aut amicis praesidendi munus iniunxit. Scaenicos ludos et assidue et varii generis ac multifariam fecit, quondam et nocturnos accensis tota urbe luminibus.

[18] He staged gladiatorial games partly in the amphitheatre of Taurus and partly in the Saepta, into which he introduced bands of Africans and Campanians of fighters chosen from each region. Nor did he himself always preside over the spectacles, but at times he imposed the duty of presiding on magistrates or friends. He produced stage-plays both continuously and of varied kinds and in many fashions, and once even night-performances with the whole city lit by lamps.

Sparsit et missilia variarum rerum et panaria cum obsonio viritim divisit; qua epulatione equiti R. contra se hilarius avidiusque vescenti partes suas misit, sed et senatori ob eandem causam codicillos, quibus praetorem eum extra ordinem designabat. Edidit et circenses plurimos a mane ad vesperam interiecta modo Africanarum venatione modo Troiae decursione, et quosdam praecipuos, minio et chrysocolla constrato circo nec ullis nisi ex senatorio ordine aurigantibus. Commisit et subitos, cum e Gelotiana apparatum circi prospicientem pauci ex proximis Maenianis postulassent.

He also scattered presents and various trifles and distributed bread-baskets with viands to individuals; at this feast he sent to the eques R., who was sitting opposite him eating more gaily and more greedily, his shares, and likewise sent little tablets to the senator for the same reason, by which he named him praetor out of the ordinary order. He also put on very many games in the circus from morning to evening, interposing now an African venation (beast-hunt), now a Troyan procession, and certain special ones, the circus sprinkled with minium and chrysocolla, and with none but drivers from the senatorial order. He likewise entrusted impromptu shows, when from the Gelotiana the apparatus of the circus looked forth, because a few men from the nearby Maeniani had requested them.

[19] Novum praeterea atque inauditum genus spectaculi excogitavit. Nam Baiarum medium intervallum [ad] Puteolanas moles, trium milium et sescentorum fere passuum spatium, ponte coniunxit contractis undique onerariis navibus et ordine duplici ad ancoras conlocatis superiectoque terreno ac derecto in Appiae viae formam. Per hunc pontem ultro citro commeavit biduo continenti, primo die phalerato equo insignisque quercea corona et caetra et gladio aureaque chlamyde, postridie quadrigario habitu curriculoque biiugi famosorum equorum, prae se ferens Dareum puerum ex Parthorum obsidibus, comitante praetorianorum agmine et in essedis cohorte amicorum.

[19] Moreover he contrived a new and unheard-of kind of spectacle. For he joined the middle stretch of Baiae to the moles of Puteoli, a distance of nearly three thousand six hundred paces, by a bridge formed from merchant-ships contracted on every side and set in double order at anchor, with earth placed above and made straight into the shape of the Appian Way. Over this bridge he traversed back and forth for two continuous days: on the first day on a phalerated (ornamented) horse, with a conspicuous oak crown and a caetra and sword and a golden chlamys; on the next day in the dress of a quadriga driver and in a two-horse curricle with famous horses, carrying before him the boy Darius from the Parthian hostages, accompanied by a column of Praetorians and in a cohort of friends in chariots.

Scio plerosque existimasse talem a Gaio pontem excogitatum aemulatione Xerxis, qui non sine admiratione aliquanto angustiorem Hellespontum contabulaverit; alios, ut Germaniam et Britanniam, quibus imminebat, alicuius inmensi operis fama territaret. Sed avum meum narrantem puer audiebam, causam operis ab interioribus aulicis proditam, quod Thrasyllus mathematicus anxio de successore Tiberio et in verum nepotem proniori affirmasset non magis Gaium imperaturum quam per Baianum sinum equis discursurum.

I know that very many supposed such a bridge to have been contrived by Gaius in emulation of Xerxes, who, not without some admiration, planked across the somewhat narrower Hellespont; others thought that, like Germany and Britain, which lay before him, the renown of some immense work might intimidate them. But I, hearing my grandfather tell it as a boy, learned that the cause of the work was betrayed by the inner palace attendants, because Thrasyllus the mathematician, anxious about Tiberius’s successor and asserting that the nearer nephew was the true heir, had declared that Gaius would no more be emperor than would gallop horses across the Bay of Baiae.

[20] Edidit et peregre spectacula, in Sicilia Syracusis asticos ludos et in Gallia Luguduni miscellos; sed hic certamen quoque Graecae Latinaeque facundiae, quo certamine ferunt victoribus praemia victos contulisse, eorundem et laudes componere coactos; eos autem, qui maxime displicuissent, scripta sua spongia linguave delere iussos, nisi ferulis obiurgari aut flumine proximo mergi maluissent.

[20] He also put on shows abroad, at Syracuse in Sicily Attic games and at Lugdunum in Gaul mixed spectacles; but here also a contest of Greek and Latin eloquence, in which contest they say the victors bestowed prizes on the vanquished, and compelled those same to compose praises; moreover those who had been most displeasing were ordered to erase their writings with a sponge or with the tongue, unless they preferred to be chastised with rods or plunged into the nearby river.

[21] Opera sub Tiberio semiperfecta, templum Augusti theatrumque Pompei, absolvit. Incohavit autem aquae ductum regione Tiburti et amphitheatrum iuxta Saepta, quorum operum a successore eius Claudio alterum peractum, omissum alterum est. Syracusis conlapsa vetustate moenia deorumque aedes refectae.

[21] Under Tiberius he finished certain works half-complete, the Temple of Augustus and the Theatre of Pompey. He moreover began an aqueduct in the region of Tiburtium and an amphitheatre next to the Saepta, of which works by his successor Claudius one was brought to completion, the other left undone. At Syracuse the walls, fallen through age, and the gods’ temples were restored.

Destinaverat et Sami Polycratis regiam restituere, Mileti Didymeum peragere, in iugo Alpium urbem condere, sed ante omnia Isthmum in Achaia perfodere, miseratque iam ad dimetiendum opus primipilarem.

He had also resolved to restore Polycrates’ royal residence at Samos, to traverse Miletus and Didymeum, to found a city upon the ridge of the Alps, but above all to cut a channel through the Isthmus in Achaia, and had already sent his chief centurion to survey the work.

[22] Hactenus quasi de principe, reliqua ut de monstro narranda sunt. Compluribus cognominibus adsumptis – nam et "pius" et "castrorum filius" et "pater exercituum" et "optimus maximus Caesar" vocabatur – cum audiret forte reges, qui officii causa in urbem advenerant, concertantis apud se super cenam de nobilitate generis, exclamavit:

[22] Thus far as though concerning the prince; the rest must be related as concerning a monster. Having assumed several cognomina — for he was called "pius" and "castrorum filius" (son of the camps) and "pater exercituum" (father of the armies) and "optimus maximus Caesar" — when he by chance heard kings, who had come into the city for the sake of duty, disputing among themselves at his table over the nobility of their birth, he exclaimed:

Nec multum afuit quin statim diadema sumeret speciemque principatus in regni formam converteret. Verum admonitus et principum et regum se excessisse fastigium, divinam ex eo maiestatem asserere sibi coepit; datoque negotio, ut simulacra numinum religione et arte praeclara, inter quae Olympii Iovis, apportarentur e Graecia, quibus capite dempto suum imponeret, partem Palatii ad forum usque promovit, atque aede Castoris et Pollucis in vestibulum transfigurata, consistens saepe inter fratres deos, medium adorandum se adeuntibus exhibebat; et quidam eum Latiarem Iovem consalutarunt. Templum etiam numini suo proprium et sacerdotes et excogitatissimas hostias instituit.

Nor was there much lacking before he would at once take the diadem and convert the semblance of the principate into the form of a kingdom. But, being warned that he had exceeded the summit of princes and kings, he began to assert for himself a divine majesty from that; and, a commission being granted that outstanding images of the gods by religion and art — among which the Olympian Jupiter — be brought from Greece, upon which, with their heads taken off, he might place his own, he advanced part of the Palatine as far as the forum, and, the temple of Castor and Pollux being transformed into a vestibule, often standing among the brother gods, he presented himself to those approaching for worship as one to be adored in the midst; and some greeted him as the Latian Jupiter. He also established for his own numen a temple and priests and the most contrived of sacrifices.

In templo simulacrum stabat aureum iconicum amiciebaturque cotidie veste, quali ipse uteretur. Magisteria sacerdotii ditissimus quisque et ambitione et licitatione maxima vicibus comparabant. Hostiae erant phoenicopteri, pavones, tetraones, numidicae, meleagrides, phasianae, quae generatim per singulos dies immolarentur.

In the temple
an image stood, golden and iconic, and was daily adorned with a garment such as he himself used.
The chief offices of the priesthood each were procured in turn by the wealthiest man through the greatest ambition and competitive bidding.
The victims were phoenicopteri (flamingoes), pavones (peacocks), tetraones, numidicae, meleagrides, phasianae (pheasants), which, generally, were sacrificed every single day.

Et noctibus quidem plenam fulgentemque lunam invitabat assidue in amplexus atque concubitum, interdiu vero cum Capitolino Iove secreto fabulabatur, modo insusurrans ac praebens in vicem aurem, modo clarius nec sine iurgiis. Nam vox comminantis audita est:

And by nights indeed he was continually inviting the full and shining moon into embraces and concubitus, while by day he conversed privately with the Capitoline Jove, now whispering and offering in turn an ear, now more openly and not without quarrels. For a voice of one threatening was heard:

donec exoratus, ut referebat, et in contubernium ultro invitatus super templum Divi Augusti ponte transmisso Palatium Capitoliumque coniunxit. Mox, quo propior esset, in area Capitolina novae domus fundamenta iecit.

until, having been entreated, as he related, and, moreover, invited into contubernium, he joined the Palatium and the Capitol above the temple of the Divine Augustus by a bridge thrown across. Soon, so that he might be nearer, he laid the foundations of a new house in the Capitoline area.

[23] Agrippae se nepotem neque credi neque dici ob ignobilitatem eius volebat suscensebatque, si qui vel oratione vel carmine imaginibus eum Caesarum insererent. Praedicabat autem matrem suam ex incesto, quod Augustus cum Iulia filia admisisset, procreatam; ac non contentus hac Augusti insectatione Actiacas Siculasque victorias, ut funestas p. R. et calamitosas, vetuit sollemnibus feriis celebrari. Liviam Augustam proaviam "Ulixem stolatum" identidem appellans, etiam ignobilitatis quadam ad senatum epistula arguere ausus est quasi materno avo decurione Fundano ortam, cum publicis monumentis certum sit, Aufidium Lurconem Romae honoribus functum.

[23] He would not have Agrippa believed or said to be his grandson on account of that man's ignobility, and he was offended if anyone, either in oration or in song, inserted him among the images of the Caesars. He moreover proclaimed that his mother was born from an incest which Augustus had committed with his daughter Julia; and not content with this persecution of Augustus, he forbade the Actian and Sicilian victories to be celebrated on the solemn festivals, as though deadly to the P. R. and calamitous. Repeatedly calling Livia Augusta his great-grandmother "Ulysses the fool," he even dared in a letter to the senate to arraign her with a certain ignobility, as if sprung from his maternal ancestor the decurion Fundanus, when by public monuments it is certain that Aufidius Lurco discharged honors at Rome.

Aviae Antoniae secretum petenti denegavit, nisi ut interveniret Macro praefectus, ac per istius modi indignitates et taedia causa exstitit mortis, dato tamen, ut quidam putant, et veneno; nec defunctae ullum honorem habuit prospexitque e triclinio ardentem rogum. Fratrem Tiberium inopinantem repente immisso tribuno militum interemit, Silanum item socerum ad necem secandasque novacula fauces compulit, causatus in utroque, quod hic ingressum se turbatius mare non esset secutus ac spe occupandi urbem, si quid sibi per tempestates accideret, remansisset, ille antidotum oboluisset, quasi ad praecavenda venena sua sumptum, cum et Silanus impatientiam nauseae vitasset et molestiam navigandi, et Tiberius propter assiduam et ingravescentem tussim medicamento usus esset. Nam Claudium patruum non nisi in ludibrium reservavit.

He refused the secret sought by his grandmother Antonia, unless Macro the prefect intervened, and through indignities and tediums of that sort the cause of death arose, venom having been given, as some think; nor did he show any honor to the deceased, but watched the pyre burning from the triclinium. He suddenly put to death his brother Tiberius by sending in a tribune of soldiers unexpectedly, and likewise drove his father-in-law Silanus to death and to have his throat cut with a razor, alleging in both cases that the one had not followed him into the sea when he entered more turbulently and had remained in the hope of occupying the city should any mischance befall him by storms, and that the other had washed away an antidote, as if taken to guard against his poisons—Silanus having avoided the nausea and discomfort of sailing, and Tiberius because he had been using a medicine for a constant and worsening cough. For he reserved his uncle Claudius only for mockery.

[24] Cum omnibus sororibus suis consuetudinem stupri fecit plenoque convivio singulas infra se vicissim conlocabat uxore supra cubante. Ex iis Drusillam vitiasse virginem praetextatus adhuc creditur atque etiam in concubitu eius quondam deprehensus ab Antonia avia, apud quam simul educabantur; mox Lucio Cassio Longino consulari conlocatam abduxit et in modum iustae uxoris propalam habuit; heredem quoque bonorum atque imperii aeger instituit. Eadem defuncta iustitium indixit, in quo risisse lavisse cenasse cum parentibus aut coniuge liberisve capital fuit.

[24] He made a habit of lustful violence with all his sisters, and at a full banquet he would place each of them beneath him in turn while his wife lay above. Of these Drusilla is believed to have been defiled while still a maiden in the praetexta, and once was caught in her intercourse by Antonia the grandmother, with whom they were brought up; soon he abducted her from Lucius Cassius Longinus, the consular, in whose charge she had been placed, and openly kept her as if a lawful wife; he also, while ill, established her as heir of his goods and of the imperium. When she died he proclaimed a iustitium, in which it was a capital offense to have laughed, bathed, or dined with parents, or with one’s spouse or children.

Ac maeroris impatiens, cum repente noctu profugisset ab urbe transcucurrissetque Campaniam, Syracusas petit, rursusque inde propere rediit barba capilloque promisso; nec umquam postea quantiscumque de rebus, ne pro contione quidem populi aut apud milites, nisi per numen Drusillae deieravit. Reliquas sorores nec cupiditate tanta nec dignatione dilexit, ut quas saepe exoletis suis prostraverit; quo facilius eas in causa Aemili Lepidi condemnavit quasi adulteras et insidiarum adversus se conscias ei. Nec solum chirographa omnium requisita fraude ac stupro divulgavit, sed et tres gladios in necem suam praeparatos Marti Ultori addito elogio consecravit.

But impatient of grief, when suddenly by night she had fled from the city and had crossed into Campania, she sought Syracuse, and again from there quickly returned with beard and hair grown long; nor ever afterward, concerning whatever matters, not even for a popular assembly of the people or among the soldiers, did she swear except by the divine power of Drusilla. She loved not her remaining sisters with such desire nor with such esteem as to spare those whom she had often overthrown from her own haunts; and so much the more easily she condemned them in the cause of Aemilius Lepidus as though adulterous and privy to plots against her. Nor did she only publish the chirographia of all, obtained by fraud and shame, but also dedicated three swords prepared for her murder to Mars Ultor with an added inscription.

[25] Matrimonia contraxerit turpius an dimiserit an tenuerit, non est facile discernere. Liviam Orestillam C. Pisoni nubentem, cum ad officium et ipse venisset, ad se deduci imperavit intraque paucos dies repudiatam biennio post relegavit, quod repetisse usum prioris mariti tempore medio videbatur. Alii tradunt adhibitum cenae nuptiali mandasse ad Pisonem contra accumbentem: "Noli uxorem meam premere," statimque e convivio abduxisse secum ac proximo die edixisse: matrimonium sibi repertum exemplo Romuli et Augusti.

[25] Whether he contracted marriages more shamefully or dismissed them or kept them, it is not easy to discern. He ordered Livia Orestilla, about to wed C. Piso, when he himself had come to the ceremony, to be led to him, and within a few days repudiated her, two years later relegating her, because it seemed she had resumed the use of her prior husband in the intervening time. Others relate that, at the nuptial dinner, he commanded to Piso reclining opposite: "Do not press upon my wife," and at once led her away from the banquet with him and the next day declared: a marriage found for himself by the example of Romulus and Augustus.

Lolliam Paulinam, C. Memmio consulari exercitus regenti nuptam, facta mentione aviae eius ut quondam pulcherrimae, subito ex provincia evocavit ac perductam a marito coniunxit sibi brevique missam fecit interdicto cuiusquam in perpetuum coitu. Caesoniam neque facie insigni neque aetate integra matremque iam ex alio viro trium filiarum, sed luxuriae ac lasciviae perditae, et ardentius et constantius amavit, ut saepe chlamyde peltaque et galea ornatam ac iuxta adequitantem militibus ostenderit, amicis vero etiam nudam. Uxorio nomine [non prius] dignatus est quam enixam, uno atque eodem die professus et maritum se eius et patrem infantis ex ea natae.

Lollia Paulina, married to C. Memmius, the consular commanding the army, with mention made of her grandmother as once most beautiful, he suddenly summoned out of the province and, led away by her husband, joined to himself, and shortly after sent away, placing her under a perpetual interdiction from any coitus. Caesonia, neither remarkable in face nor unblemished in years, and already mother by another man of three daughters, but ruined by luxury and lasciviousness, he loved both more ardently and more steadfastly, so that often clothed with cloak, small shield, and helmet and riding alongside the soldiers he displayed her to the troops, and to friends even naked. He did not deign to call her wife [not before] she had borne; on that one and the same day he proclaimed himself both her husband and the father of the infant born from her.

Infantem autem, Iuliam Drusillam appellatam, per omnium dearum templa circumferens Minervae gremio imposuit alendamque et instituendam commendavit. Nec ullo firmiore indicio sui seminis esse credebat quam feritatis, quae illi quoque tanta iam tunc erat, ut infestis digitis ora et oculos simul ludentium infantium incesseret.

He bore the infant, called Iulia Drusilla, about through the temples of all the goddesses and placed her in Minerva’s lap, commending her to be nourished and instructed. Nor did he believe there was any firmer sign of his own seed than ferity, which even then in that child was so great that with hostile fingers she set upon the mouths and eyes of other infants playing together.

[26] Leve ac frigidum sit his addere, quo propinquos amicosque pacto tractaverit, Ptolemaeum regis Iubae filium, consobrinum suum – erat enim et is M. Antoni ex Selene filia nepos – et in primis ipsum Macronem, ipsam Enniam, adiutores imperii; quibus omnibus pro necessitudinis iure proque meritorum gratia cruenta mors persoluta est.

[26] It would be trifling and cold to add here how he handled by pact his near kinsmen and friends, Ptolemaeus, the son of King Juba, his cousin — for he too was a grandson of M. Antonius by the daughter Selene — and above all Macron himself, Ennia herself, supporters of the empire; to all of whom, by right of relationship and for the sake of merited services, a bloody death was exacted.

Nihilo reverentior leniorve erga senatum, quosdam summis honoribus functos ad essedum sibi currere togatos per aliquot passuum milia et cenanti modo ad pluteum modo ad pedes stare succinctos linteo passus est; alios cum clam interemisset, citare nihilo minus ut vivos perseveravit, paucos post dies voluntaria morte perisse mentitus. Consulibus oblitis de natali suo edicere abrogavit magistratum fuitque per triduum sine summa potestate res p. Quaestorem suum in coniuratione nominatum flagellavit veste detracta subiectaque militum pedibus, quo firme verberaturi insisterent.

Not at all more reverent or gentler toward the senate, he permitted certain men, who had discharged the highest honors, to run to his chariot, togated, for several thousand paces, and, while he was dining, to stand sometimes at the dining-stand, sometimes at his feet, girded with a linen cloth; others, though they had actually died in secret, he nevertheless continued to summon as if alive, and he lied that a few had perished by voluntary death some days later. Forgetting the consuls’ birthday he abrogated the edict concerning it; the magistracy was annulled and the res publica was for three days without supreme power. He scourged his quaestor, having been named in the conspiracy, after stripping him of his garment and laying him under the soldiers’ feet, so that they, to beat him the more firmly, might press down.

Simili superbia violentiaque ceteros tractavit ordines. Inquietatus fremitu gratuita in circo loca de media nocte occupantium, omnis fustibus abegit; elisi per eum tumultum viginti amplius equites R., totidem matronae, super innumeram turbam ceteram. Scaenicis ludis, inter plebem et equitem causam discordiarum ferens, decimas maturius dabat, ut equestria ab infimo quoque occuparentur.

Simili arrogance and violence he treated the other orders. Disturbed by the gratuitous shouting of those occupying places in the circus from midnight, he drove them all off with rods; in that tumult more than twenty equites R. were crushed, as many matrons, above an innumerable remaining throng. At the scenic games, bearing the cause of discord between the plebs and the equestrian order, he granted the decimations earlier, so that even the very lowest might occupy equestrian rank.

Gladiatorio munere reductis interdum flagrantissimo sole velis emitti quemquam vetabat, remotoque ordinario apparatu tabidas feras, vilissimos senioque confectos gladiatores, proque paegniariis patres familiarum notos in bonam partem sed insignis debilitate aliqua corporis subiciebat. Ac nonnumquam horreis praeclusis populo famem indixit.

At the gladiatorial spectacle, when the awnings were at times drawn back under the most blazing sun he forbade that anyone be sent out; and with the ordinary apparatus removed he exposed emaciated beasts, the vilest gladiators spent by senility, and, instead of hired fighters, he subjected well-known fathers of households to the sport — though with some notable debility of body. And sometimes, with the granaries shut, he proclaimed famine upon the people.

[27] Saevitiam ingenii per haec maxime ostendit. Cum ad saginam ferarum muneri praeparatarum carius pecudes compararentur, ex noxiis laniandos adnotavit, et custodiarum seriem recognoscens, nullius inspecto elogio, stans tantum modo intra porticum mediam, "a calvo ad calvum" duci imperavit. Votum exegit ab eo, qui pro salute sua gladiatoriam operam promiserat, spectavitque ferro dimicantem nec dimisit nisi victorem et post multas preces.

[27] He showed the savagery of his genius most of all by these acts. When, for the feeding of the beasts prepared for the munus, larger payments were being made for cattle, he marked the guilty to be torn apart, and, reviewing the roster of the guards, without inspecting any one's elogium, standing only within the middle portico, he ordered them to be led "from bald man to bald man." He exacted an oath from him who had promised gladiatorial service for his safety, and he watched him fighting with iron and did not dismiss him except as victor and after many prayers.

Alterum, qui se periturum ea de causa voverat, cunctantem pueris tradidit, verbenatum infulatumque votum reposcentes per vicos agerent, quoad praecipitaretur ex aggere. Multos honesti ordinis deformatos prius stigmatum notis ad metalla et munitiones viarum aut ad bestias condemnavit aut bestiarum more quadripedes cavea coercuit aut medios serra dissecuit, nec omnes gravibus ex causis, verum male de munere suo opinatos, vel quod numquam per genium suum deierassent. Parentes supplicio filiorum interesse cogebat; quorum uni valitudinem excusanti lecticam misit, alium a spectaculo poenae epulis statim adhibuit atque omni comitate ad hilaritatem et iocos provocavit.

The other, who had vowed that he would perish for that reason, delivered the hesitating man to the boys, bidding them drive him through the streets, scourged and garlanded, seeking that vow, until he was hurled from the rampart. He condemned many deformed men of respectable rank, first by marks of stigma, to the mines and the fortifications of roads or to the beasts, or, in the manner of beasts, confined them in a four‑footed cage, or sawed them open through the middle; and not all for weighty causes, but those thought ill of for their spectacle, or because they had never sworn by their genius. He forced parents to be present at the punishment of their sons; to one, excusing his infirmity, he sent a litter; another he at once removed from the show to the punitive feast and, with every courtesy, provoked him to hilarity and jests.

Curatorem munerum ac venationum per continuos dies in conspectu suo catenis verberatum non prius occidit quam offensus putrefacti cerebri odore. Atellanae poetam ob ambigui ioci versiculum media amphitheatri harena igni cremavit. Equitem R. obiectum feris, cum se innocentem proclamasset, reduxit abscisaque lingua rursus induxit.

The curator of the munera and of the hunts, beaten with chains for successive days in his sight, was not killed until he offended [him] with the stench of putrefied brain. They burned the Atellan poet with fire in the middle of the amphitheatre’s arena for a verse of ambiguous jest. He restored the knight Equitem R., thrown to the beasts, when he had proclaimed himself innocent, and, his tongue having been cut off, led him back in again.

[28] Revocatum quendam a vetere exilio sciscitatus, quidnam ibi facere consuesset, respondente eo per adulationem: "Deos semper oravi ut, quod evenit, periret Tiberius et tu imperares," opinans sibi quoque exules suos mortem imprecari, misit circum insulas, qui universos contrucidarent. Cum discerpi senatorem concupisset, subornavit qui ingredientem curiam repente hostem publicum appellantes invaderent, graphisque confossum lacerandum ceteris traderent; nec ante satiatus est quam membra et artus et viscera hominis tracta per vicos atque ante se congesta vidisset.

[28] Asked of a certain man recalled from old exile what he was wont to do there, he, answering by adulation, said: "I have always prayed to the gods that, as has happened, Tiberius might perish and that you might rule," thinking that even his exiles cursed death for him; he sent about the islands men to cut them all down. When he desired that a senator be torn limb from limb, he suborned men to assail the one entering the curia, suddenly calling him a public enemy, and to hand him over to others to be pierced with javelins and mangled; nor was he satisfied until he had seen the limbs and joints and entrails of the man dragged through the streets and heaped up before him.

[29] Immanissima facta augebat atrocitate verborum. Nihil magis in natura sua laudare se ac probare dicebat quam, ut ipsius verbo utar, ἀδιατρεψίαν, hoc est inverecundiam. Monenti Antoniae aviae tamquam parum esset non oboedire: "Memento," ait, "omnia mihi et in omnis licere." Trucidaturus fratrem, quem metu venenorum praemuniri medicamentis suspicabatur: "Antidotum," inquit, "adversus Caesarem?" Relegatis sororibus non solum insulas habere se, sed etiam gladios minabatur.

[29] He increased the most monstrous deeds by the atrocity of his words. He said that nothing in his nature he praised and approved more than, to use his own word, ἀδιατρεψίαν, that is, shamelessness. To his admonishing grandmother Antonia it seemed as if not obeying her were insufficient: "Remember," he said, "everything is permitted to me and to all." About to slaughter his brother, whom he suspected was being fortified against poison by antidotes, he said, "An antidote against Caesar?" With his sisters banished he threatened not only islands for them but even swords.

Praetorium virum ex secessu Anticyrae, quam valitudinis causa petierat, propagari sibi commeatum saepius desiderantem cum mandasset interimi, adiecit necessariam esse sanguinis missionem, cui tam diu non prodesset elleborum. Decimo quoque die numerum puniendorum ex custodia subscribens rationem se purgare dicebat. Gallis Graecisque aliquot uno tempore condemnatis gloriabatur Gallograeciam se subegisse.

The praetorium, when it ordered the man sent from his retirement at Anticyra — which he had sought for the sake of his health — who had repeatedly desired his leave of absence to be prolonged, to be put to death, added that a letting of blood was necessary, to which hellebore would not avail for so long. On the tenth day, also, signing the roster of those to be punished from custody, he said that by that account he would clear himself. With several Gauls and Greeks condemned at the same time he boasted that he had subjugated Gallograecia.

[30] Non temere in quemquam nisi crebris et minutis ictibus animadverti passus est, perpetuo notoque iam praecepto: "Ita feri ut se mori sentiat." Punito per errorem nominis alio quam quem destinaverat, ipsum quoque paria meruisse dixit. Tragicum illud subinde iactabat:

[30] He allowed himself to note no one rashly save by frequent and minute blows, with a continual and by now well-known precept: "Ita feri ut se mori sentiat." — "Strike so that he may feel himself to be dying." Having punished by a mistake of name someone other than him whom he had destined, he said that even that man had deserved equal things. He kept repeating that tragic phrase:

Saepe in cunctos pariter senatores ut Seiani clientis, ut matris ac fratrum suorum delatores, invectus est prolatis libellis, quos crematos simulaverat, defensaque Tiberi saevitia quasi necessaria, cum tot criminantibus credendum esset. Equestrem ordinem ut scaenae harenaeque devotum assidue proscidit. Infensus turbae faventi adversus studium suum exclamavit: "Utinam p. R. unam cervicem haberet!" Cumque Tetrinius latro postularetur, et qui postularent, Tetrinios esse ait.

Saepe he inveighed against all the senators alike as Seianus’ clients, as the delatores of his mother and brothers, producing libels which he had pretended were burned, and defended Tiberius’ cruelty as if necessary, since it must be believed when so many accused. He constantly cut down the equestrian order as devoted to the scaena and the arena. Hostile to the crowd that favoured him, he cried out against its zeal: "Utinam p. R. unam cervicem haberet!" And when Tetrinius was demanded as a robber, and those who demanded him, he said they were Tetrinii.

Retiari tunicati quinque numero gregatim dimicantes sine certamine ullo totidem secutoribus succubuerant; cum occidi iuberentur, unus resumpta fuscina omnes victores interemit: hanc ut crudelissimam caedem et deflevit edicto et eos, qui spectare sustinuissent, execratus est.

The tunic-clad retiarii, five in number, fighting together in ranks without any contest, had yielded to as many secutores; when they were ordered to be killed, one, having taken up again a trident, slew all the victors: he both lamented this most cruel slaughter by edict and cursed those who had endured to behold it.

[31] Queri etiam palam de condicione temporum suorum solebat, quod nullis calamitatibus publicis insignirentur; Augusti principatum clade Variana, Tiberi ruina spectaculorum apud Fidenas memorabilem factum, suo oblivionem imminere prosperitate rerum; atque identidem exercituum caedes, famem, pestilentiam, incendia, hiatum aliquem terrae optabat.

[31] He was also wont openly to complain about the condition of his times, that they were not marked by any public calamities; he wished that Augustus’ principate had been made memorable by the Varian disaster, that Tiberius’ ruin had been made memorable by the collapse of the spectacles at Fidenae, and that his own oblivion was threatened by the prosperity of affairs; and again and again he longed for slaughter of armies, famine, pestilence, fires, some yawning chasm of the earth.

[32] Animum quoque remittenti ludoque et epulis dedito eadem factorum dictorumque saevitia aderat. Saepe in conspectu prandentis vel comisantis seriae quaestiones per tormenta habebantur, miles decollandi artifex quibuscumque e custodia capita amputabat. Puteolis dedicatione pontis, quem excogitatum ab eo significavimus, cum multos e litore invitasset ad se, repente omnis praecipitavit, quosdam gubernacula apprehendentes contis remisque detrusit in mare.

[32] With his spirit relaxed and given to play and banquets, the same savagery of deeds and words was present. Often in the sight of one dining or reveling, serious interrogations were held by torments; a soldier, an artificer of beheading, severed the heads of whomever from the guard. At Puteoli, at the dedication of the bridge, which we have said was contrived by him, when he had invited many from the shore to his presence, he suddenly hurled them all headlong; some, clutching the rudders, he cast down into the sea with poles and oars.

Romae publico epulo servum ob detractam lectis argenteam laminam carnifici confestim tradidit, ut manibus abscisis atque ante pectus e collo pendentibus, praecedente titulo qui causam poenae indicaret, per coetus epulantium circumduceretur. Murmillonem e ludo rudibus secum battuentem et sponte prostratum confodit ferrea sica ac more victorum cum palma discucurrit. Admota altaribus victima succinctus poparum habitu elato alte malleo cultrarium mactavit.

At Rome, at a public banquet he immediately delivered a slave to the executioner for having torn off a silver lamina from the couches, so that, with his hands cut off and his throat hanging before his breast, a placard preceding him to show the cause of the punishment, he might be led about through the throng of diners. He stabbed a Murmillo, a raw recruit from the ludus who had been sparring with him and had fallen of his own accord, with an iron sica, and, like victors, ran about bearing a palm. Brought to the altars as a victim, girt in the garb of priests, with the mallet raised high he sacrificed him with the cultrarius.

Lautiore convivio effusus subito in cachinnos consulibus, qui iuxta cubabant, quidnam rideret blande quaerentibus: "Quid," inquit, "nisi uno meo nutu iugulari utrumque vestrum statim posse?"

Having been lavishly at table, he suddenly burst into loud laughter at the more sumptuous banquet, to the consuls who were reclining nearby, when they, blandly asking what he laughed at, he said: "What, unless by a single nod of mine it were possible to have both of you throat-cut at once?"

[33] Inter varios iocos, cum assistens simulacro Iovis Apellen tragoedum consuluisset uter illi maior videretur, cunctantem flagellis discidit conlaudans subinde vocem deprecantis quasi etiam in gemitu praedulcem. Quotiens uxoris vel amiculae collum exoscularetur, addebat: "tam bona cervix simul ac iussero demetur." Quin et subinde iactabat exquisiturum se vel fidiculis de Caesonia sua, cur eam tanto opere diligeret.

[33] Amid various jests, when, standing by the statue of Jupiter, he had asked Apelles the tragedian which of them seemed greater to him, he scourged the one who hesitated with lashes, praising meanwhile the suppliant's voice as, even in a groan, very sweet. Whenever he kissed the neck of his wife or mistress, he would add: "so good a neck, at once when I order, will be removed." Moreover he kept boasting that he would even question, by means of fiddles, his Caesonia about why he loved her so exceedingly.

[34] Nec minore livore ac malignitate quam superbia saevitiaque paene adversus omnis aevi hominum genus grassatus est. Statuas virorum inlustrium ab Augusto ex Capitolina area propter angustias in campum Martium conlatas ita subvertit atque disiecit ut restitui salvis titulis non potuerint, vetuitque posthac viventium cuiquam usquam statuam aut imaginem nisi consulto et auctore se poni. Cogitavit etiam de Homeri carminibus abolendis, cur enim sibi non licere dicens, quod Platoni licuisset, qui eum e civitate quam constituebat eiecerit?

[34] He raged with no less envy and malignity than with pride and savagery, laying about himself almost against every class of mankind. He overturned and scattered the statues of illustrious men, which Augustus had had removed from the Capitoline area into the Campus Martius because of crowding, so that they could not be restored with their inscriptions intact; and he thereafter forbade that the statue or image of any living person be set up anywhere unless by his counsel and authority. He even contemplated abolishing the poems of Homer — for why should it not be permitted to him what had been permitted to Plato, who had expelled him from the city he was founding?

Sed et Vergili ac Titi Livi scripta et imagines paulum afuit quin ex omnibus bibliothecis amoveret, quorum alterum ut nullius ingenii minimaeque doctrinae, alterum ut verbosum in historia neglegentemque carpebat. De iuris quoque consultis, quasi scientiae eorum omnem usum aboliturus, saepe iactavit se mehercule effecturum ne quid respondere possint praeter eum.

But he was also not far from removing the writings and portraits of Vergil and Titus Livius from all libraries, attacking the one as of no genius and of the smallest learning, the other as verbose in history and negligent. Concerning the jurists too, as if about to abolish all use of their science, he often boasted, mehercule, that he would see to it that they could answer nothing except through him.

[35] Vetera familiarum insignia nobilissimo cuique ademit, Torquato torquem, Cincinnato crinem, Cn. Pompeio stirpis antiquae Magni cognomen. Ptolemaeum, de quo rettuli, et arcessitum e regno et exceptum honorifice, non alia de causa repente percussit, quam quod edente se munus ingressum spectacula convertisse hominum oculos fulgore purpureae abollae animadvertit. Pulchros et comatos, quotiens sibi occurrerent, occipitio raso deturpabat.

[35] He stripped away the ancient insignia of families from each most noble man: to Torquatus the torque, to Cincinnatus the lock of hair, to Cn. Pompeius the cognomen "Magnus" of his ancient stock. Ptolemaeus, whom I have related, both summoned from his kingdom and received with honour, he suddenly struck down for no other cause than that, as he was presenting a gift and entered, he noticed that the spectators had turned men's eyes to the splendour of the purple abolla in which he had come. He disfigured the handsome and long‑haired, whenever they met him, by shaving the back of their heads.

Erat Aesius Proculus patre primipilari, ob egregiam corporis amplitudinem et speciem Colosseros dictus; hunc spectaculis detractum repente et in harenam deductum Thraeci et mox hoplomacho comparavit bisque victorem constringi sine mora iussit et pannis obsitum vicatim circumduci ac mulieribus ostendi, deinde iugulari. Nullus denique tam abiectae condicionis tamque extremae sortis fuit, cuius non commodis obtrectaret. Nemorensi regi, quod multos iam annos poteretur sacerdotio, validiorem adversarium subornavit.

There was Aesius Proculus, son of a primipilaris, called Colosseros on account of his outstanding bodily amplitude and appearance; this man, suddenly torn away from the spectacles and led into the sand, the Thracians at once matched against a hoplomachus, and he ordered the twice‑victorious fighter to be bound without delay and, swathed in rags, to be publicly paraded through the quarter and shown to the women, then to be slaughtered at the throat. In short, there was no one of so abject a condition and so extreme a lot whose advantages he did not disparage. He set up a stronger adversary against the Nemorensian king, because the latter had for many years held the priesthood.

Cum quodam die muneris essedario Porio post prosperam pugnam servum suum manumittenti studiosius plausum esset, ita proripuit se spectaculis, ut calcata lacinia togae praeceps per gradus iret, indignabundus et clamitans dominum gentium populum ex re levissima plus honoris gladiatori tribuentem quam consecratis principibus aut praesenti sibi.

When one day at the spectacle of the charioteer Porius, after a fortunate contest, more eager applause was bestowed on a man who was freeing his slave, he so flung himself into the shows that with the lacinia of his toga trodden down he went headlong down the steps, indignant and shouting that the lord of the nations and the people, for a most trivial thing, were giving more honor to a gladiator than to consecrated princes or to himself present.

[36] Pudicitiae neque suae neque alienae pepercit. M. Lepidum, Mnesterem pantomimum, quosdam obsides dilexisse fertur commercio mutui stupri. Valerius Catullus, consulari familia iuvenis, stupratum a se ac latera sibi contubernio eius defessa etiam vociferatus est.

[36] He spared neither his own nor another’s pudicity. He is said to have loved M. Lepidus, Mnester the pantomime, and certain hostages, in a commerce of mutual rape. Valerius Catullus, a youth of consular family, cried out that he had been raped by him and that his sides were worn out by his contubernium.

Super sororum incesta et notissimum prostitutae Pyrallidis amorem non temere ulla inlustriore femina abstinuit. Quas plerumque cum maritis ad cenam vocatas praeterque pedes suos transeuntis diligenter ac lente mercantium more considerabat, etiam faciem manu adlevans, si quae pudore submitterent; quotiens deinde libuisset egressus triclinio, cum maxime placitam sevocasset, paulo post recentibus adhuc lasciviae notis reversus vel laudabat palam vel vituperabat, singula enumerans bona malave corporis atque concubitus. Quibusdam absentium maritorum nomine repudium ipse misit iussitque in acta ita referri.

Concerning the sisters’ incest and the notorious love of the prostitute Pyrallis, no woman of more illustrious rank refrained lightly. Which women, when for the most part invited to dinner with their husbands and moreover passing by at his feet, he would consider carefully and slowly in the manner of merchants weighing goods, even lifting their faces with his hand if any lowered them in shame; how often then, when he pleased to leave the dining-room, having above all summoned his favourite aside, a little later returned still marked by fresh signs of lasciviousness and either praised openly or blamed, enumerating each pleasant and unpleasant thing of the body and of their couplings. For some he sent a repudiation in the name of absent husbands and ordered that it be entered in the records thus.

[37] Nepotatus sumptibus omnium prodigorum ingenia superavit, commentus novum balnearum usum, portentosissima genera ciborum atque cenarum, ut calidis frigidisque unguentis lavaretur, pretiosissima margarita aceto liquefacta sorberet, convivis ex auro panes et obsonia apponeret, aut frugi hominem esse oportere dictitans aut Caesarem. Quin et nummos non mediocris summae e fastigio basilicae Iuliae per aliquot dies sparsit in plebem. Fabricavit et deceris Liburnicas gemmatis puppibus, versicoloribus velis, magna thermarum et porticuum et tricliniorum laxitate magnaque etiam vitium et pomiferarum arborum varietate; quibus discumbens de die inter choros ac symphonias litora Campaniae peragraret.

[37] By expenditures of every prodigy he outdid inventive genius, having devised a new use for baths, and the most portentous kinds of foods and banquets, so that he might be bathed with hot and cold unguents, and might sip the most precious pearls melted in vinegar; he set before his guests breads and delicacies of gold, continually repeating that one ought either to be a frugal man or a Caesar. Nay, he even scattered coins of no mean highest value from the eaves of the Basilica Julia into the people for several days. He also fashioned Liburnian ships with gemmed sterns and variegated sails, with a great laxity of baths and porticoes and triclinia, and with great vice and a variety of fruit-bearing trees; reclining on these by day, amid choruses and symphonies, he traversed the shores of Campania.

In exstructionibus praetoriorum atque villarum omni ratione posthabita nihil tam efficere concupiscebat quam quod posse effici negaretur. Et iactae itaque moles infesto ac profundo mari et excisae rupes durissimi silicis et campi montibus aggere aequati et complanata fossuris montium iuga, incredibili quidem celeritate, cum morae culpa capite lueretur. Ac ne singula enumerem, immensas opes totumque illud Ti. Caesaris vicies ac septies milies sestertium non toto vertente anno absumpsit.

In the building up of praetoria and villas, with every other consideration set aside, he longed to accomplish nothing so much as that which was said to be impossible. And so great masses were hurled into the hostile and abyssal sea, cliffs of the hardest flint were hewn away, fields were levelled and mountain-heaps made into embankments and smoothed with ditches and the ridges of mountains, all with incredible swiftness — a delay for which he paid with his head. And lest I enumerate particulars, he consumed immense riches and the whole of that of Tiberius Caesar, twenty and seven-times‑a‑thousand sesterces, in not even a full year turned over.

[38] Exhaustus igitur atque egens ad rapinas convertit animum vario et exquisitissimo calumniarum et auctionum et vectigalium genere. Negabat iure civitatem Romanam usurpare eos, quorum maiores sibi posterisque eam impetrassent, nisi si filii essent, neque enim intellegi debere "posteros" ultra hunc gradum; prolataque Divorum Iuli et Augusti diplomata ut vetera et obsoleta deflabat. Arguebat et perperam editos census, quibus postea quacumque de causa quicquam incrementi accessisset.

[38] Worn out and needy, therefore, he turned his mind to plunder by a varied and most exquisite kind of calumnies and auctions and taxes. He denied that by law the Roman citizenship could be usurped by those whose ancestors had obtained it for themselves and for their posterity, unless they were sons — for "posteros" ought not to be understood beyond that degree; and with the diplomas of the Divine Julius and Augustus having been produced, he blew them off as old and obsolete. He also attacked the censuses improperly issued, to which afterwards, for whatever cause, any accession of increment had attached.

Testamenta primipilarium, qui ab initio Tiberi principatus neque illum neque se heredem reliquissent, ut ingrata rescidit; item ceterorum ut irrita et vana, quoscumque quis diceret herede Caesare mori destinasse. Quo metu iniecto cum iam et ab ignotis inter familiares et a parentibus inter liberos palam heres nuncuparetur, derisores vocabat, quod post nuncupationem vivere perseverarent, et multis venenatas matteas misit. Cognoscebat autem de talibus causis, taxato prius modo summae ad quem conficiendum consideret, confecto demum excitabatur.

The wills of the primipilarii, who from the beginning of Tiberius’ principate had named neither him nor themselves as heir, were cut off as ungrateful; likewise those of the others as null and vain, whosoever one might say had by naming Caesar as heir destined himself to die. With that fear thrown in, when now even by unknown men among householders and by parents among children an heir was publicly named, he called them deriders, because they continued to live after the nuncupation, and he sent many poisoned matteas. He moreover inquired into such cases, first having appraised beforehand the sum by which to effect the matter, and when at last it had been effected he was roused.

Ac ne paululum quidem morae patiens super quadraginta reos quondam ex diversis criminibus una sententia condemnavit gloriatusque est expergefacta e somno Caesonia quantum egisset, dum ea meridiaret.

And not even a little patient of delay, he once condemned more than 40 accused from various crimes by a single sentence, and he vaunted, having been roused from sleep by Caesonia, how much he had accomplished while she tarried at noon.

Auctione proposita reliquias omnium spectaculorum subiecit ac venditavit, exquirens per se pretia et usque eo extendens, ut quidam immenso coacti quaedam emere ac bonis exuti venas sibi inciderent. Nota res est, Aponio Saturnino inter subsellia dormitante, monitum a Gaio praeconem ne praetorium virum crebro capitis motu nutantem sibi praeteriret, nec licendi finem factum, quoad tredecim gladiatores sestertium nonagies ignoranti addicerentur.

He put the remnants of all the spectacles up for auction and sold them off, personally seeking the prices and extending them so far that some, compelled by immense sums, were forced to buy certain things and, stripped of their goods, even went so far as to sell their very veins. It is a well-known matter that, Aponius Saturninus sleeping among the benches, having been warned by Gaius the crier not to pass by the praetorian man who kept frequently nodding his head to him, no end of the sale was made until thirteen gladiators were adjudged to the unknowing man at ninety sestertii apiece.

[39] In Gallia quoque, cum damnatarum sororum ornamenta et supellectilem et servos atque etiam libertos immensis pretiis vendidisset, invitatus lucro, quidquid instrumenti veteris aulae erat ab urbe repetiit, comprensis ad deportandum meritoriis quoque vehiculis et pistrinensibus iumentis, adeo ut et panis Romae saepe deficeret et litigatorum plerique, quod occurrere absentes ad vadimonium non possent, causa caderent. Cui instrumento distrahendo nihil non fraudis ac lenocinii adhibuit, modo avaritiae singulos increpans et quod non puderet eos locupletiores esse quam se, modo paenitentiam simulans quod principalium rerum privatis copiam faceret. Compererat provincialem locupletem ducenta sestertia numerasse vocatoribus, ut per fallaciam convivio interponeretur, nec tulerat moleste tam magno aestimari honorem cenae suae; huic postero die sedenti in auctione misit, qui nescio quid frivoli ducentis milibus traderet diceretque cenaturum apud Caesarem vocatu ipsius.

[39] In Gaul also, when he had sold the ornaments and furniture and slaves and even freedmen of the condemned sisters at immense prices, invited by profit he reclaimed from the city whatever apparatus of the old palace there was, having seized for removal even vehicles and laden beasts and mill-beasts, so that bread often failed at Rome and many litigants, because those absent could not appear for their bail, fell from their causes. To detach that apparatus he employed nothing but fraud and pandering, now reproaching individuals for avarice and saying that it would not shame them to be richer than he, now feigning penitence because he was making private abundance of principal goods. He had learned that a wealthy provincial had counted out two hundred thousand sesterces to the summons-bearers, so that by a trick it might be interposed at a banquet, nor could he brook being esteemed so highly an honor to his dinner; to this man, the next day while seated at the auction, he sent one who should say that he would hand over some trifling thing for two hundred thousand and would dine with Caesar at his invitation.

[40] Vectigalia nova atque inaudita primum per publicanos, deinde, quia lucrum exuberabat, per centuriones tribunosque praetorianos exercuit, nullo rerum aut hominum genere omisso, cui non tributi aliquid imponeret. Pro edulibus, quae tota urbe venirent, certum statumque exigebatur; pro litibus ac iudiciis ubicumque conceptis quadragesima summae, de qua litigaretur, nec sine poena, si quis composuisse vel donasse negotium convinceretur; ex gerulorum diurnis quaestibus pars octava; ex capturis prostitutarum quantum quaeque uno concubitu mereret; additumque ad caput legis, ut tenerentur publico et quae meretricium quive lenocinium fecissent, nec non et matrimonia obnoxia essent.

[40] New and unheard-of vectigalia at first levied through the publicani, then, because profit overflowed, exacted through centurions and praetorian tribunes, omitting no class of things or men to which he did not impose some tribute. For the ediles, who came through the whole city, a fixed quota and assessment were demanded; for suits and judgments wherever conceived a fortieth of the sum about which they litigated, and not without punishment if anyone were convicted of having compounded or given away the business; from the daily gains of the geruli an eighth part; from the captures of prostitutes as much as each earned in a single concubitus; and added to the head of the law that those who had practised prostitution or any lenocinium were to be held to public account, nor were marriages likewise to be exempt.

[41] Eius modi vectigalibus indictis neque propositis, cum per ignorantiam scripturae multa commissa fierent, tandem flagitante populo proposuit quidem legem, sed et minutissimis litteris et angustissimo loco, uti ne cui describere liceret. Ac ne quod non manubiarum genus experiretur, lupanar in Palatio constituit, districtisque et instructis pro loci dignitate compluribus cellis, in quibus matronae ingenuique starent, misit circum fora et basilicas nomenculatores ad invitandos ad libidinem iuvenes senesque; praebita advenientibus pecunia faenebris appositique qui nomina palam subnotarent, quasi adiuvantium Caesaris reditus. Ac ne ex lusu quidem aleae compendium spernens plus mendacio atque etiam periurio lucrabatur.

[41] With such new taxes decreed but not proclaimed, and since by ignorance of the script many things were committed, at last, with the people clamoring, he did indeed propose a law, but in the tiniest letters and in the narrowest place, so that no one might be permitted to copy it. And lest any sort of manual service remain untried, he established a brothel on the Palatine, and having allotted and furnished several cells in keeping with the dignity of the place, in which matrons and freeborn persons would stand, he sent nomenclators around the fora and basilicas to invite young men and old to lust; usurious money being offered to those who came and men set to note names openly, as if assisting the return of Caesar. And not even from the gambling game, scorning profit by chance, did he refrain from gaining by more lying and even perjury.

Et quondam proximo conlusori demandata vice sua progressus in atrium domus, cum praetereuntis duos equites R. locupletis sine mora corripi confiscarique iussisset, exultans rediit gloriansque numquam se prosperiore alea usum.

And once, having been entrusted with the turn of the nearest fellow-gambler and having advanced into the atrium of the house, when he had ordered two equites of R., wealthy, who were passing by, to be seized without delay and confiscated, he returned exultant and boasting that he had never enjoyed a more prosperous alea.

[42] Filia vero nata paupertatem nec iam imperatoria modo sed et patria conquerens onera conlationes in alimonium ac dotem puellae recepit. Edixit et strenas ineunte anno se recepturum stetitque in vestibulo aedium Kal. Ian.

[42] The daughter, born into poverty and complaining not only in an imperial manner but also as a fellow citizen about the burdens of levies, received contributions toward the girl’s maintenance and dowry. She also proclaimed that she would accept the New‑Year gifts at the opening of the year, and stood in the vestibule of the house on the Kalends of January.

ad captandas stipes, quas plenis ante eum manibus ac sinu omnis generis turba fundebat. Novissime contrectandae pecuniae cupidine incensus, saepe super immensos aureorum acervos patentissimo diffusos loco et nudis pedibus spatiatus et toto corpore aliquamdiu volutatus est.

to seize the donations, which a crowd of every sort was pouring out before him with full hands and in their bosoms. At last, inflamed by a desire to handle the money to be touched, he often walked with naked feet and for some time rolled his whole body over immense heaps of gold spread out in the most open place.

[43] Militiam resque bellicas semel attigit neque ex destinato, sed cum ad visendum nemus flumenque Clitumni Mevaniam processisset, admonitus de supplendo numero Batavorum, quos circa se habebat, expeditionis Germanicae impetum cepit; neque distulit, sed legionibus et auxiliis undique excitis, dilectibus ubique acerbissime actis, contracto et omnis generis commeatu quanto numquam antea, iter ingressus est confecitque modo tam festinanter et rapide, ut praetorianae cohortes contra morem signa iumentis imponere et ita subsequi cogerentur, interdum adeo segniter delicateque, ut octaphoro veheretur atque a propinquarum urbium plebe verri sibi vias et conspergi propter pulverem exigeret.

[43] He once touched upon military and warlike matters, not by design, but when he had advanced to visit the grove and the Clitumnus river near Mevania, being warned to make up the number of Batavians whom he had about him, he seized upon the German expedition; nor did he delay, but with legions and auxiliaries raised on every side, levies everywhere most harshly pressed, and with all manner of supplies contracted to a degree never before, he entered upon the march and completed it so hastily and swiftly that the Praetorian cohorts, contrary to custom, were forced to place their standards on beasts of burden and thus follow; at times so sluggishly and delicately that he was borne in an octaphoros and demanded that the roads be swept for him and sprinkled because of the dust by the populace of the neighboring towns.

[44] Postquam castra attigit, ut se acrem ac severum ducem ostenderet, legatos, qui auxilia serius ex diversis locis adduxerant, cum ignominia dimisit; at in exercitu recensendo plerisque centurionum maturis iam et nonnullis ante paucissimos quam consummaturi essent dies, primos pilos ademit, causatus senium cuiusque et imbecillitatem; ceterorum increpita cupiditate commoda emeritae militiae ad senum milium summam recidit. Nihil autem amplius quam Adminio Cynobellini Britannorum regis filio, qui pulsus a patre cum exigua manu transfugerat, in deditionem recepto, quasi universa tradita insula, magnificas Romam litteras misit, monitis speculatoribus, ut vehiculo ad forum usque et curiam pertenderent nec nisi in aede Martis ac frequente senatu consulibus traderent.

[44] After he reached the camp, and in order to present himself as an eager and severe commander, he dismissed with ignominy the legates who had brought auxiliaries late from diverse places; but in mustering the army, for many centurions whose terms were already nearly expired and some only a few days from completion, he removed the primi pili, alleging the old age and imbecility of each; the rest, reproved by a desire for the advantages of veteran service, were reduced to the total sum of a thousand veterans. Nothing more, however, than to Adminius, son of Cynobellinus king of the Britons, who, having been driven out by his father had defected with a small band and, being received in surrender, as if the entire island had been handed over, sent magnificent letters to Rome, warning the speculatores that they should carry him by vehicle even to the Forum and the Curia and deliver him to the consuls only in the temple of Mars and before a crowded senate.

[45] Mox deficiente belli materia paucos de custodia Germanos traici occulique trans Rhenum iussit ac sibi post prandium quam tumultuosissime adesse hostem nuntiari. Quo facto proripuit se cum amicis et parte equitum praetorianorum in proximam silvam, truncatisque arboribus et in modum tropaeorum adornatis ad lumina reversus, eorum quidem qui secuti non essent timiditatem et ignaviam corripuit, comites autem et participes victoriae novo genere ac nomine coronarum donavit, quas distinctas solis ac lunae siderumque specie exploratorias appellavit. Rursus obsides quosdam abductos e litterario ludo clamque praemissos, deserto repente convivio, cum equitatu insecutus veluti profugos ac reprehensos in catenis reduxit; in hoc quoque mimo praeter modum intemperans.

[45] Soon, with the material for war failing, he had a few Germans of the guard ferried across and hidden beyond the Rhine and ordered that the enemy be reported to be present after dinner with the greatest possible tumult. When this was done he hurled himself with friends and part of the praetorian horse into a nearby wood, and, returning to the lights with trees cut down and set up in the manner of trophies, he rebuked the timidity and cowardice of those who had not followed; but to his companions and sharers in the victory he bestowed a new kind and name of crowns, which he called exploratoriae, distinguished by the appearance of the sun and moon and stars. Again he brought back certain hostages taken from the elementary school and secretly sent ahead — having suddenly abandoned the banquet, he pursued them with cavalry as if they were fugitives and, having seized them, led them back in chains; in this mime too he was excessively intemperate.

Repetita cena renuntiantis coactum agmen sic ut erant loricatos ad discumbendum adhortatus est. Monuit etiam notissimo Vergili versu "durarent secundisque se rebus servarent."

With the report that the meal had been repeated, he forced the column, loricati as they were, to lie down to dine. He also admonished them with the very well‑known verse of Vergil, "durarent secundisque se rebus servarent."

Atque inter haec absentem senatum populumque gravissimo obiurgavit edicto, quod Caesare proeliante et tantis discriminibus obiecto tempestiva convivia, circum et theatra et amoenos secessus celebrarent.

Atque inter haec he severely rebuked, by edict, the absent senate and people most gravely, because, with Caesar fighting and exposed to such great dangers, they were celebrating timely banquets around the theatres and in pleasant retreats.

[46] Postremo quasi perpetraturus bellum, derecta acie in litore Oceani ac ballistis machinisque dispositis, nemine gnaro aut opinante quidnam coepturus esset, repente ut conchas legerent galeasque et sinus replerent imperavit, "spolia Oceani" vocans "Capitolio Palatioque debita," et in indicium victoriae altissimam turrem excitavit, ex qua ut Pharo noctibus ad regendos navium cursus ignes emicarent; pronuntiatoque militi donativo centenis viritim denariis, quasi omne exemplum liberalitatis supergressus: "abite," inquit, "laeti, abite locupletes."

[46] Finally, as if about to carry out a war, with a straight battle‑line on the shore of the Ocean and ballistae and machines arrayed, no one aware or guessing what he was about to undertake, suddenly he ordered that they gather shells, don helmets, and fill their sails, calling them "spoils of the Ocean" due to the Capitol and the Palatium, and as a token of victory he raised a very high tower, from which, like at the Pharos, by night fires would flash to govern the courses of ships; and when the soldier’s donative was proclaimed he bestowed one hundred denarii apiece, as if having surpassed every example of liberality: "go," he said, "go away joyful, go away wealthy."

[47] Conversus hinc ad curam triumphi praeter captivos ac transfugas barbaros Galliarum quoque procerissimum quemque et, ut ipse dicebat, ἀξιοθριάμβευτον, ac nonnullos ex principibus legit ac seposuit ad pompam coegitque non tantum rutilare et summittere comam, sed et sermonem Germanicum addiscere et nomina barbarica ferre. Praecepit etiam triremis, quibus introierat Oceanum, magna ex parte itinere terrestri Romam devehi. Scripsit et procuratoribus, triumphum appararent quam minima summa, sed quantus numquam alius fuisset, quando in omnium hominum bona ius haberent.

[47] Turning then to the care of the triumph, besides the captives and barbarian deserters he chose out also the tallest of the Gauls and, as he himself said, ἀξιοθριάμβευτον, and set aside some from the chiefs and compelled them to the pomp — not only to redden and let down their hair, but also to learn the Germanic tongue and to bear barbaric names. He also ordered that the triremes by which he had entered the Ocean be transported to Rome, for the most part, by overland journey. He wrote likewise to the procurators that they should prepare the triumph with the smallest possible sum, yet so great as never before, since they would have legal claim to the goods of all men.

[48] Prius quam provincia decederet, consilium iniit nefandae atrocitatis legiones, quae post excessum Augusti seditionem olim moverant, contrucidandi, quod et patrem suum Germanicum ducem et se infantem tunc obsedissent, vixque a tam praecipiti cogitatione revocatus, inhiberi nullo modo potuit quin decimare velle perseveraret. Vocatas itaque ad contionem inermes, atque etiam gladiis depositis, equitatu armato circumdedit. Sed cum videret suspecta re plerosque dilabi ad resumenda si qua vis fieret arma, profugit contionem confestimque urbem petit, deflexa omni acerbitate in senatum, cui ad avertendos tantorum dedecorum rumores palam minabatur, querens inter cetera fraudatum se iusto triumpho, cum ipse paulo ante, ne quid de honoribus suis ageretur, etiam sub mortis poena denuntiasset.

[48] Before he quitted the province he devised a plan of nefarious atrocity to slaughter the legions which, after the death of Augustus, had once raised sedition, because they had then besieged both his father Germanicus the general and himself as an infant; and scarcely recalled from so precipitous a thought, he could in no wise be restrained from persisting in the desire to decimate them. He therefore summoned them unarmed to a public assembly, and even with their swords laid aside, surrounded them with mounted troops in arms. But when he saw that, the matter being suspected, most were slipping away to take up arms if any force were used, he fled the assembly and at once made for the city, turning from all bitterness into the senate, where openly he threatened to avert rumors of such great disgraces, complaining among other things that he had been defrauded of a rightful triumph, since he himself a little before, lest anything should be acted on concerning his honors, had even denounced under penalty of death.

[49] Aditus ergo in itinere a legatis amplissimi ordinis ut maturaret orantibus, quam maxima voce: "veniam," inquit, "veniam, et hic mecum," capulum gladii crebro verberans, quo cinctus erat. Edixit et reverti se, sed iis tantum qui optarent, equestri ordini et populo; nam se neque civem neque principem senatui amplius fore. Vetuit etiam quemquam senatorum sibi occurrere.

[49] He therefore approached on the road with the legates of the most noble order begging that he hurry; in the loudest voice he said, "I will come, I will come, and this one with me," often striking the hilt of the sword by which he was girded. He also ordered that he would return, but only to those who wished it, to the equestrian order and to the people; for he would be neither citizen nor prince to the senate any longer. He forbade any of the senators to meet him.

Atque omisso vel dilato triumpho ovans urbem natali suo ingressus est; intraque quartum mensem periit, ingentia facinora ausus et aliquanto maiora moliens, siquidem proposuerat Antium, deinde Alexandream commigrare interempto prius utriusque ordinis electissimo quoque. Quod ne cui dubium videatur, in secretis eius reperti sunt duo libelli diverso titulo, alteri "gladius," alteri "pugio" index erat; ambo nomina et notas continebant morti destinatorum. Inventa et arca ingens variorum venenorum plena, quibus mox a Claudio demersis infecta maria traduntur non sine piscium exitio, quos enectos aestus in proxima litora eiecit.

And with the triumph omitted or postponed, rejoicing he entered the city on his natal day; and within four months he perished, having dared tremendous crimes and plotting somewhat greater, for he had purposefully set his mind to migrate to Antium, then to Alexandria, after first having slain even the most select of both orders. That there be no doubt of this, in his private papers were found two little tablets bearing different titles, one headed "gladius," the other "pugio"; both contained the names and marks of those destined for death. Also discovered was a huge chest full of various poisons, which, soon after being cast down by Claudius, are said to have infected the seas—not without the death of fish, which the tides, having killed them, cast up upon the nearest shores.

[50] Statura fuit eminenti, colore expallido, corpore enormi, gracilitate maxima cervicis et crurum, oculis et temporibus concavis, fronte lata et torva, capillo raro at circa verticem nullo, hirsutus cetera. Quare transeunte eo prospicere ex superiore parte aut omnino quacumque de causa capram nominare, criminosum et exitiale habebatur. Vultum vero natura horridum ac taetrum etiam ex industria efferabat componens ad speculum in omnem terrorem ac formidinem.

[50] He was of eminent stature, of pallid colour, with an enormous body, with the greatest gracility of neck and of the legs, eyes and temples hollow, brow broad and stern, hair scarce and about the vertex none, the rest hirsute. Wherefore, when he passed, to look from the upper part or for any cause at all to name a goat was held criminal and deadly. His countenance, moreover, nature made horrid and taeter, and he even by art heightened it, composing before a mirror into every terror and dread.

Valitudo ei neque corporis neque animi constitit. Puer comitiali morbo vexatus, in adulescentia ita patiens laborum erat, ut tamen nonnumquam subita defectione ingredi, stare, colligere semet ac sufferre vix posset. Mentis valitudinem et ipse senserat ac subinde de secessu deque purgando cerebro cogitavit.

Valitudo ei neque corporis neque animi constitit. He had health of neither body nor mind. As a boy vexed by the comitial disease, in youth he was so patient of labors that nevertheless at times, with a sudden defection, he could scarcely begin to fall, to stand, to collect himself, and to endure. He himself had also perceived the soundness of his mind and repeatedly thought about withdrawal and about purging the brain.

Creditur potionatus a Caesonia uxore amatorio quidem medicamento, sed quod in furorem verterit. Incitabatur insomnio maxime; neque enim plus quam tribus nocturnis horis quiescebat ac ne iis quidem placida quiete, sed pavida miris rerum imaginibus, ut qui inter ceteras pelagi quondam speciem conloquentem secum videre visus sit. Ideoque magna parte noctis vigiliae cubandique taedio nunc toro residens, nunc per longissimas porticus vagus invocare identidem atque expectare lucem consuerat.

He is believed to have been drugged by Caesonia, his wife, with an amatory medicament, yet one that turned him into frenzy. He was driven most of all by insomnia; for he slept no more than three nocturnal hours, and not even in those with placid quiet, but with trembling, by strange images of things, so that he once seemed to see, among other visions of the sea, a form conversing with him. And thus for a great part of the night, from the weariness of waking and of lying down, now resting on his couch, now wandering through the very long porticoes, he was wont to call aloud again and again and to await the light.

[51] Non inmerito mentis valitudini attribuerim diversissima in eodem vitia, summam confidentiam et contra nimium metum. Nam qui deos tanto opere contemneret, ad minima tonitrua et fulgura conivere, caput obvolvere, at vero maiore proripere se e strato sub lectumque condere solebat. Peregrinatione quidem Siciliensi irrisis multum locorum miraculis repente a Messana noctu profugit Aetnaei verticis fumo ac murmure pavefactus.

[51] Not undeservedly would I ascribe to the malady of his mind the very diverse vices in the same man: the highest confidence and, contrariwise, excessive fear. For he who would so greatly contemn the gods would screw up his eyes at the smallest thunder and lightning, wrap his head about, and yet at a greater alarm was wont to fling himself from his couch and hide under the bed. Indeed, on his Sicilian peregrination, scorning many local miracles, he suddenly fled by night from Messana, terrified by the smoke and murmur of Aetna’s summit.

Adversus barbaros quoque minacissimus, cum trans Rhenum inter angustias densumque agmen iter essedo faceret, dicente quodam non mediocrem fore consternationem sicunde hostis appareat, equum ilico conscendit ac propere reversus ad pontes, ut eos calonibus et impedimentis stipatos repperit, impatiens morae per manus ac super capita hominum translatus est. Mox etiam audita rebellione Germaniae fugam et subsidia fugae classes apparabat, uno solacio adquiescens transmarinas certe sibi superfuturas provincias, si victores Alpium iuga, ut Cimbri, vel etiam urbem, ut Senones quondam, occuparent; unde credo percussoribus eius postea consilium natum apud tumultuantes milites ementiendi, ipsum sibi manus intulisse nuntio malae pugnae perterritum.

Most menacing even against the barbarians, when he was making his journey by chariot across the Rhine through narrow passes and a dense column, and a certain man saying that no small consternation would follow if the enemy should appear thus, he immediately mounted a horse and, hastening back to the bridges, found them crowded with camp-followers and baggage; impatient of delay, he was carried by hands and over the heads of men. Soon too, on hearing of a rebellion in Germany, flight and supplies for the flight of the fleets were in prospect, comforting himself with the single consolation that overseas provinces would at least remain to him, if the victors should occupy the ridges of the Alps, as the Cimbri, or even a city, as once the Senones did; whence I believe a plan was afterwards born to his assailants, among the tumultuous soldiers, of fabricating reports, and that they laid hands on the messenger, who, terrified by news of a disastrous battle, was seized.

[52] Vestitu calciatuque et cetero habitu neque patrio neque civili, ac ne virili quidem ac denique humano semper usus est. Saepe depictas gemmatasque indutus paenulas, manuleatus et armillatus in publicum processit; aliquando sericatus et cycladatus; ac modo in crepidis vel coturnis, modo in speculatoria caliga, nonnumquam socco muliebri; plerumque vero aurea barba, fulmen tenens aut fuscinam aut caduceum deorum insignia, atque etiam Veneris cultu conspectus est. Triumphalem quidem ornatum etiam ante expeditionem assidue gestavit, interdum et Magni Alexandri thoracem repetitum e conditorio eius.

[52] In dress, in footwear, and in other habit he made use of neither the patriachial nor the civic, nor indeed even the virile and finally the human garb. Often clad in painted and gemmed paenulae, sleeved and braceleted, he went forth into public; sometimes silk-clad and diademed; and at one time in crepidae or cothurni, at another in a speculator’s caliga, sometimes in a woman’s soccus; more often truly with a golden beard, holding a thunderbolt or a scepter or the caduceus, the insignia of the gods, and even seen in the cult of Venus. He constantly bore a triumphal ornament even before the expedition, and sometimes even the thorax of Alexander the Great, reclaimed from his chest.

[53] Ex disciplinis liberalibus minimum eruditioni, eloquentiae plurimum attendit, quantumvis facundus et promptus, utique si perorandum in aliquem esset. Irato et verba et sententiae suppetebant, pronuntiatio quoque et vox, ut neque eodem loci prae ardore consisteret et exaudiretur a procul stantibus. Peroraturus stricturum se lucubrationis suae telum minabatur, lenius comptiusque scribendi genus adeo contemnens, ut Senecam tum maxime placentem "commissiones meras" componere et "harenam esse sine calce" diceret.

[53] From the liberal disciplines he paid the least attention to erudition, the very greatest to eloquence, however eloquent and ready he was, and especially if he were to make a peroration against someone. When angry both words and opinions were at hand, as also pronunciation and voice, so that, from the ardor of the moment, he did not remain fixed in one spot and was audible to those standing far off. About to perorate he threatened that he would draw the weapon of his lucubrations, so despising the gentler, more ornate kind of writing that he would say Seneca — then most pleasing — composed "commissiones meras" and that "harenam esse sine calce."

Solebat etiam prosperis oratorum actionibus rescribere et magnorum in senatu reorum accusationes defensionesque meditari ac, prout stilus cesserat, vel onerare sententia sua quemque vel sublevare, equestri quoque ordine ad audiendum invitato per edicta.

He was also wont, after prosperous actions of orators, to write replies and to meditate accusations and defences of great men in the senate, and, as his style permitted, either to burden each with his opinion or to uplift them, the equestrian order likewise invited to hear by edicts.

[54] Sed et aliorum generum artes studiosissime et diversissimas exercuit. Thraex et auriga, idem cantor atque saltator, battuebat pugnatoriis armis, aurigabat exstructo plurifariam circo; canendi ac saltandi voluptate ita efferebatur, ut ne publicis quidem spectaculis temperaret quo minus et tragoedo pronuntianti concineret et gestum histrionis quasi laudans vel corrigens palam effingeret. Nec alia de causa videtur eo die, quo periit, pervigilium indixisse quam ut initium in scaenam prodeundi licentia temporis auspicaretur.

[54] But he also most zealously practiced arts of other sorts and the most diverse. A Thraex and a charioteer, the same man a singer and a dancer, he fought with gladiatorial arms, he drove chariots in a circus built in many ways; by the delight of singing and dancing he was so carried away that not even at public spectacles did he refrain from singing in concert with the tragedian who proclaimed and from publicly shaping the actor’s gesture, as if praising or correcting it. Nor does it seem for any other reason that on the day on which he died he proclaimed a vigil than that he might await the auspices of the hour for the beginning of his coming forward onto the stage.

Saltabat autem nonnumquam etiam noctu; et quondam tres consulares secunda vigilia in Palatium accitos multaque et extrema metuentis super pulpitum conlocavit, deinde repente magno tibiarum et scabellorum crepitu cum palla tunicaque talari prosiluit ac desaltato cantico abiit. Atque hic tam docilis ad cetera natare nesciit.

He would sometimes even dance at night; and once he had three consulars, summoned at the second watch, brought into the Palace and placed many and the most extreme belongings of the fearful upon the pulpit, then suddenly, with a great clatter of pipes and scabella, clad in his palla and a long tunic he sprang up and, breaking into song, went away. And this man, so docile in other matters, did not know how to swim.

[55] Quorum vero studio teneretur, omnibus ad insaniam favit. Mnesterem pantomimum etiam inter spectacula osculabatur, ac si qui saltante eo vel leviter obstreperet, detrahi iussum manu sua flagellabat. Equiti R. tumultuanti per centurionem denuntiavit, abiret sine mora Ostiam perferretque ad Ptolemaeum regem in Mauretaniam codicillos suos; quorum exemplum erat: "ei quem istoc misi, neque boni quicquam neque mali feceris." Thraeces quosdam Germanis corporis custodibus praeposuit.

[55] Held fast by the zeal of these men, he urged all on to madness. He even kissed the pantomime Mnester among the spectacles, and if anyone made a noise at his dancing, even lightly, he ordered him to be dragged off and scourged with his own hand. To the horseman R., who was making a tumult, he announced through a centurion that he should depart without delay to Ostia and carry his codicils to King Ptolemaeus in Mauretania; the wording of the injunction was: "to him whom I sent there, you shall do neither any good nor any harm." He set certain Thracians over the German bodyguards.

Murmillonum armaturas recidit. Columbo victori, leviter tamen saucio, venenum in plagam addidit, quod ex eo Columbinum appellavit; sic certe inter alia venena scriptum ab eo repertum est. Prasinae factioni ita addictus et deditus, ut cenaret in stabulo assidue et maneret, agitatori Eutycho comisatione quadam in apophoretis vicies sestertium contulit.

He cut up the armatures of the Murmillones. To Columbo the victor, though lightly wounded, he added poison into the wound, which he called Columbinum from him; thus, certainly, among other poisons one inscribed by him was found. So addicted and devoted to the Prasina faction, that he dined continually in the stable and remained there, he bestowed upon the charioteer Eutyches at a certain revel, in apophoreta, twenty thousand sesterces.

Incitato equo, cuius causa pridie circenses, ne inquietaretur, viciniae silentium per milites indicere solebat, praeter equile marmoreum et praesaepe eburneum praeterque purpurea tegumenta ac monilia e gemmis domum etiam et familiam et supellectilem dedit, quo lautius nomine eius invitati acciperentur; consulatum quoque traditur destinasse.

With the horse urged on — for whose sake the circenses had been held the day before — lest it be disturbed he was accustomed to proclaim the silence of the vicinity by means of soldiers; besides a marble equile and an ivory manger, and besides purple coverings and gem-studded necklaces, he gave also a house and a household and furnishings, so that those invited might receive him under the more lavish name; it is also reported that he intended to bestow the consulship.

[56] Ita bacchantem atque grassantem non defuit plerisque animus adoriri. Sed una atque altera conspiratione detecta, aliis per inopiam occasionis cunctantibus, duo consilium communicaverunt perfeceruntque, non sine conscientia potentissimorum libertorum praefectorumque praetori; quod ipsi quoque etsi falso in quadam coniuratione quasi participes nominati, suspectos tamen se et invisos sentiebant. Nam et statim seductis magnam fecit invidiam destricto gladio affirmans sponte se periturum, si et illis morte dignus videretur, nec cessavit ex eo criminari alterum alteri atque inter se omnis committere.

[56] Thus, with him bacchanting and raging, the spirit to assault was not lacking in very many. But, the one and the other plot having been detected, some hesitating for lack of opportunity, two communicated the counsel and effected it, not without the knowledge of the most powerful freedmen and praetorian prefects; which they themselves, although falsely named as if sharers in a certain conspiracy, yet felt themselves suspected and ill‑seen. For at once, when they had been led aside, he made a great hatred by drawing his sword, asserting that he would perish of his own accord if he were thought worthy of death by them, nor did he cease from accusing one another on that account and from committing all things among themselves.

Cum placuisset Palatinis ludis spectaculo egressum meridie adgredi, primas sibi partes Cassius Chaerea tribunus cohortis praetoriae depoposcit, quem Gaius seniorem iam et mollem et effeminatum denotare omni probro consuerat et modo signum petenti "Priapum" aut "Venerem" dare, modo ex aliqua causa agenti gratias osculandam manum offerre formatam commotamque in obscaenum modum.

When it had been decided to accost him as he came forth at midday from the spectacle of the Palatine games, Cassius Chaerea, tribune of the praetorian cohort, demanded the first parts for himself; Gaius was already accustomed to mark him out with every reproach as aged, soft, and effeminate, and now at one time to give, to one asking a sign, "Priapum" or "Venerem," now for some reason to offer his hand—arranged and stirred—to be kissed in an obscene manner.

[57] Futurae caedis multa prodigia exstiterunt. Olympiae simulacrum Iovis, quod dissolvi transferrique Romam placuerat, tantum cachinnum repente edidit, ut machinis labefactis opifices diffugerint; supervenitque ilico quidam Cassius nomine, iussum se somnio affirmans immolare taurum Iovi. Capitolium Capuae Id. Mart.

[57] Many portents of the future slaughter appeared. The simulacrum of Jove at Olympia, which had been decided to be dismantled and transferred to Rome, suddenly uttered so great a cachinnus that the machines were shaken and the workmen fled; and immediately there arrived a certain Cassius by name, affirming that he had been ordered in a dream to immolate a bull to Jove. The Capitol of Capua — on the Ides of March.

de caelo tactum est, item Romae cella Palatini atriensis. Nec defuerunt qui coniectarent altero ostento periculum a custodibus domino portendi, altero caedem rursus insignem, qualis eodem die facta quondam fuisset. Consulenti quoque de genitura sua Sulla mathematicus certissimam necem appropinquare affirmavit.

it was struck from the sky, and likewise in Rome the cell of the Palatine atrium. Nor were there lacking those who conjectured that by one portent danger was being signified for the master by his guards, by the other again a conspicuous slaughter, such as once had been done on that very day. To him consulting also about his nativity, Sulla the mathematician declared that a most certain death was drawing near.

Monuerunt et Fortunae Antiatinae, ut a Cassio caveret; qua causa ille Cassium Longinum Asiae tum proconsulem occidendum delegaverat, inmemor Chaeream Cassium nominari. Pridie quam periret, somniavit consistere se in caelo iuxta solium Iovis impulsumque ab eo dextri pedis pollice et in terras praecipitatum. Prodigiorum loco habita sunt etiam, quae forte illo ipso die paulo prius acciderant.

They also warned the Fortuna of Antium to beware of Cassius; for this reason he had delegated Cassius Longinus, then proconsul of Asia, to be slain, forgetful that Chaerea was named Cassius. On the day before he died he dreamed that he stood in heaven beside the throne of Jove and was struck by the thumb of his right foot and hurled down to the earth. Also reckoned among the prodigies were those things which by chance had occurred a little earlier that very day.

Sacrificans respersus est phoenicopteri sanguine; et pantomimus Mnester tragoediam saltavit, quam olim Neoptolemus tragoedus ludis, quibus rex Macedonum Philippus occisus est, egerat; et cum in Laureolo mimo, in quo a[u]ctor proripiens se ruina sanguinem vomit, plures secundarum certatim experimentum artis darent, cruore scaena abundavit. Parabatur et in noctem spectaculum, quo argumenta inferorum per Aegyptios et Aethiopas explicarentur.

The sacrificer was sprinkled with the blood of a flamingo; and the pantomime Mnester danced a tragoedia, which once Neoptolemus, a tragedian, had performed at the games at which King Philip of the Macedonians was slain; and when in the Laureolus mime, in which the actor rushing forward throws himself with a ruin and vomits blood, many, eagerly contending to display the practice of the craft, the stage overflowed with gore. A spectacle was also prepared for the night, in which the episodes of the underworld were to be expounded by Egyptians and Ethiopians.

[58]VIIII. Kal. Febr.

[58] 9 days before the Kalends of February.

hora fere septima cunctatus an ad prandium surgeret marcente adhuc stomacho pridiani cibi onere, tandem suadentibus amicis egressus est. Cum in crypta, per quam transeundum erat, pueri nobiles ex Asia ad edendas in scaena operas evocati praepararentur, ut eos inspiceret hortareturque restitit, ac nisi princeps gregis algere se diceret, redire ac repraesentare spectaculum voluit. Duplex dehinc fama est: alii tradunt adloquenti pueros a tergo Chaeream cervicem gladio caesim graviter percussisse praemissa voce: "hoc age!" Dehinc Cornelium Sabinum, alterum e coniuratis, tribunum ex adverso traiecisse pectus; alii Sabinum summota per conscios centuriones turba signum more militiae petisse et Gaio "Iovem" dante Chaeream exclamasse: "accipe ratum!" Respicientique maxillam ictu discidisse.

about the seventh hour
hesitating whether he should rise for lunch, his stomach still sinking under the load of the previous day's food, at last, with friends urging, he went out. When in the crypt through which he had to pass noble boys from Asia, summoned to enact pieces on the stage, were being prepared, he stopped so that he might inspect and exhort them, and, unless the leader of the troupe said that he was chilled, he wished to return and to reenact the spectacle. A double rumour then follows: some relate that, while addressing the boys, someone from behind struck Chaerea's neck with a sword, grievously wounding it, after the preliminary cry, "do this!" Then Cornelius Sabinus, another of the conspirators, is said to have pierced the tribune's breast opposite him; others say that Sabinus, having been pushed aside by the centurions privy to the plot, the crowd sought the signal in the manner of soldiers, and, Gaius giving the word "Iupiter," they cried to Chaerea, "take it — it is settled!" And as he turned his head, the blow split his jaw.

Iacentem contractisque membris clamitantem se vivere ceteri vulneribus triginta confecerunt; nam signum erat omnium: "repete!" Quidam etiam per obscaena ferrum adegerunt. Ad primum tumultum lecticari cum asseribus in auxilium accucurrerunt, mox Germani corporis custodes, ac nonnullos ex percussoribus, quosdam etiam senatores innoxios interemerunt.

They finished off the one lying there, his limbs contracted and crying that he lived, with thirty wounds; for the signal of all was: "repeat!" Some also thrust the sword into obscene places. At the first tumult the litter-bearers ran up with poles to give aid; soon the Germani, the guards of the body, slew several of the assailants, and even put to death some harmless senators.

[59] Vixit annis viginti novem, imperavit triennio et decem mensibus diebusque octo. Cadaver eius clam in hortos Lamianos asportatum et tumultuario rogo semiambustum levi caespite obrutum est, postea per sorores ab exilio reversas erutum et crematum sepultumque. Satis constat, prius quam id fieret, hortorum custodes umbris inquietatos; in ea quoque domo, in qua occubuerit, nullam noctem sine aliquo terrore transactam, donec ipsa domus incendio consumpta sit.

[59] He lived twenty-nine years, and reigned three years and ten months and eight days. His corpse was secretly carried into the Lamian gardens and on a tumultuary pyre half-burned and covered with a light sod was laid; afterwards, his sisters, returned from exile, exhumed it and burned it and buried it. It is well attested that before this was done the gardeners were troubled by shadows; and in that same house in which he lay no night was passed without some terror, until the house itself was consumed by fire.

Perit una et uxor Caesonia gladio a centurione confossa et filia parieti inlisa.

One woman likewise perished: his wife Caesonia, stabbed with a sword by a centurion,
and his daughter dashed against the wall.

[60] Condicionem temporum illorum etiam per haec aestimare quivis possit. Nam neque caede vulgata statim creditum est, fuitque suspicio ab ipso Gaio famam caedis simulatam et emissam, ut eo pacto hominum erga se mentes deprehenderet; neque coniurati cuiquam imperium destinaverunt; et senatus in asserenda libertate adeo consensit, ut consules primo non in curiam, quia Iulia vocabatur, sed in Capitolium convocarent, quidam vero sententiae loco abolendam Caesarum memoriam ac diruenda templa censuerint. Observatum autem notatumque est in primis Caesares omnes, quibus Gai praenomen fuerit, ferro perisse, iam inde ab eo, qui Cinnanis temporibus sit occisus.

[60] One may even judge the condition of those times from these things. For the slaughter was not at once believed when circulated, and there was suspicion from Gai himself that the report of the slaughter had been simulated and put forth, so that by that device he might detect men's minds toward him; nor did the conspirators appoint rule to any one; and the senate agreed so wholly in asserting liberty that at first the consuls were convened not into the curia, because it was called Iulia, but into the Capitol; indeed some, in place of a senatorial opinion, proposed that the memory of the Caesars be abolished and their temples razed. It was moreover especially observed and noted that all Caesars bearing the praenomen Gai had perished by the sword, already from him who was killed in the Cinnan times.