Apuleius: METAMORPHOSES

[1] Die sequenti meus quidem dominus hortulanus quid egerit nescio, me tamen miles ille, qui propter eximiam impotentiam pulcherrime vapularat, ab illo praesepio nullo equidem contradicente dictum abducit atque a suo contubernio — hoc enim mihi videbatur sarcinis propriis onustum et prorsum exornatum armatumque militariter producit ad viam. Nam et galeam nitore praedicantem et scutum gerebam longius relucens, sed etiam lanceam longissimo hastili conspicuam, quae scilicet non disciplinae tunc quidem causa, sed propter sarcinarum cumulo ad instar exercitus sedulo composuerat. Confecta campestri nec adeo difficili via quandam civitatulam pervenimus nec in stabulo, sed in domo cuiusdam decurionis devertimus.

[1] The following day what my master the gardener did I do not know; me, however, that soldier—who because of exceptional lack of self-restraint had been most beautifully thrashed—leads away from that stall, with indeed no one gainsaying it, as ordered, and from his contubernium — for this seemed to me loaded with his own packs and altogether decked out and armed in military fashion — he brings me out onto the road. For I was bearing a helmet proclaiming itself by its brilliance and a shield gleaming from farther off, and even a lance conspicuous for its very long shaft, which of course he had carefully arrayed then not for the sake of discipline, but because of the heap of baggage, in the likeness of an army. The level and not so difficult road having been completed, we reached a certain small town, and we turned aside not into a stable, but into the house of a certain decurion.

Statimque me commendato cuidam servulo ipse ad praepositum suum, qui mille armatorum ducatum sustinebat, sollicite proficiscitur.

And immediately, with me commended to a certain servant-lad, he himself sets out anxiously to his praepositus, who was sustaining the ducat of a thousand men-at-arms.

[2] Post dies plusculos ibidem dissignatum scelestum ac nefarium facinus memini, sed ut vos etiam legatis, ad librum profero. Dominus aedium habebat iuvenem filium prope litteratum atque ob id consequenter pietate modestia praecipuum, quem tibi quoque provenisse cuperes vel talem. Huius matre multo ante defuncta rursum matrimonium sibi reparaverat ductaque alia filium procreaverat alium, qui adaeque iam duodecimum annum aetatis supergressus erat.

[2] After a few days more I recall that in that same place a wicked and nefarious deed was delineated; but so that you also may read it, I bring it forward into the book. The master of the house had a young son, almost lettered, and on that account consequently outstanding in piety and modesty, such as you too would wish to have come to you, even such a one. His mother having died long before, he had restored marriage for himself again, and, another woman having been led home, he had begotten another son, who likewise had now surpassed the 12th year of age.

Sed noverca forma magis quam mortibus in domo mariti praepollens, seu naturaliter impudica seu fato ad extremum impulsa flagitium, oculos ad privignum adiecit. Iam ergo, lector optime, scito te tragoediam, non fabulam legere et a socco ad coturnum ascendere.

But the stepmother, preeminent in beauty rather than in morals in her husband’s house, whether naturally shameless or by fate at the last driven to a flagitious outrage, cast her eyes upon her stepson. Now then, best reader, know that you are reading a tragedy, not a fable, and that you are ascending from the sock to the buskin.

Sed mulier illa, quamdiu primis elementis Cupido parvulus nutriebatur, imbecillis adhuc eius viribus facile ruborem tenuem deprimens silentio resistebat. At ubi completis igne vaesano totis praecordiis inmodice bacchatus Amor exaestuabat, saevienti deo iam succubuit, et languore simulato vulnus animi mentitur [in] corporis valetudinem. Iam cetera salutis vultusque detrimenta et aegris et amantibus examussim convenire nemo qui nesciat: pallor deformis, marcentes oculi, lassa genua, quies turbida et suspiritus cruciatus tarditate vehementior.

But that woman, while little Cupid in his first elements was being nourished, his powers still imbecile, by depressing a slight blush easily was resisting in silence. But when, her whole precordia filled with mad fire, Love, immoderately bacchating, was seething, she now succumbed to the raging god, and with feigned languor she counterfeits the wound of her mind [into] a bodily illness. Now as for the other detriments of health and of countenance, there is no one who does not know that they fit exactly both the sick and lovers: a misshapen pallor, eyes withering, knees weary, a troubled rest, and sighs—a torment the more vehement for its slowness.

Crederes et illam fluctuare tantum vaporibus febrium, nisi quod et flebat. Heus medicorum ignarae mentes, quid venae pulsus, quid coloris intemperantia, quid fatigatus anhelitus et utrimquesecus iactatae crebiter laterum mutuae vicissitudines? Dii boni, quam facilis licet non artifici medico cuivis tamen docto Veneriae cupidinis comprehensio, cum videas aliquem sine corporis calore flagrantem!

You would have believed her too to be tossed only by the vapors of fevers, if not for the fact that she was also weeping. Hey, ignorant minds of the doctors, what of the pulse of the veins, what of the intemperance of the complexion, what of the wearied panting, and on both sides the reciprocal alternations of the flanks, tossed frequently to and fro? Good gods, how easy—though not to the unskilled physician, yet to any learned man—is the comprehension of Venereal desire, when you see someone blazing without bodily heat!

[3] Ergo igitur impatientia furoris altius agitata diutinum rupit silentium at ad se vocari praecipit filium — quod nomen in eo, si posset, ne ruboris admoneretur, libenter eraderet. Nec adulescens aegrae parentis moratus imperium, senili tristitie striatam gerens frontem, cubiculum petit, uxori patris matrique fratris utcumque debitum sistens obsequium. Sed illa cruciabili silentio diutissime fatigata et ut in quodam vado dubitationis haerens omne verbum, quod praesenti sermoni putabat aptissimum, rursum improbans nutante etiam nunc pudore, unde potissimum caperet exordium, decunctatur.

[3] Therefore then, with the impatience of her fury stirred more deeply, she ruptured the long-standing silence and orders that her son be summoned to her — a name which, as applied to him, if she could, she would gladly erase, lest she be reminded of shame. Nor did the youth delay the command of his ailing parent; bearing a brow striated with senile sadness, he seeks the bedchamber, rendering the deference, as far as was due, to his father’s wife and to his brother’s mother. But she, long wearied by a cruciating silence and, as if sticking in a certain ford of hesitation, again disapproving every word which she thought most apt for the present discourse, with modesty even now wavering, dallies over whence she should take her exordium most fittingly.

At iuvenis nihil etiam tunc sequius suspicatus summisso vultu rogat ultro praesentis causas aegritudinis. Tunc illa nacta solitudinis damnosam occasionem prorumpit in audaciam et ubertim adlacrimans laciniamque contegens faciem voce trepida sic eum breviter adfatur:

But the young man, suspecting nothing worse even then, with downcast countenance unprompted asks the causes of the present affliction. Then she, having seized the ruinous opportunity of solitude, breaks out into audacity and, weeping copiously and covering her face with the edge of her garment, with a trembling voice thus briefly addresses him:

"Causa omnis et origo praesentis doloris set etiam medela ipsa et salus unica mihi tute ipse es. Isti enim tui oculi per meos oculos ad intima delapsi praecordia meis medullis acerrimum commovent incendium. Ergo miserere tua causa pereuntis nec te religio patris omnino deterreat, cui morituram prorsus servabis uxorem. Illius enim recognoscens imaginem in tua facie merito te diligo.

"All the cause and origin of the present sorrow, but also the remedy itself and the sole salvation for me, are you yourself. For those eyes of yours, having slipped through my eyes down into the inmost heart, stir a most keen conflagration in my marrow. Therefore have pity on one perishing on your account, and let not the reverence due to your father deter you altogether, for you will preserve for him a wife who would otherwise assuredly die. For, recognizing his image in your face, I love you deservedly.

Habes solitudinis plenam fiduciam, habes capax necessarii facinoris otium. Nam quod nemo novit, paene non fit."

"You have the full confidence of solitude; you have leisure ample for the necessary deed. For what no one knows, almost does not happen."

[4] Repentino malo perturbatus adulescens, quanquam tale facinus protinus exhorruisset, non tamen negationis intempestiva severitate putavit exasperandum, sed cautae promissionis dilatione leniendum. Ergo prolixe pollicetur et bonum caperet animum refectionique se ac saluti redderet impendio suadet, donec patris aliqua profectione liberum voluptati concederetur spatium, statimque se refert a noxio conspectu novercae. Et tam magnam domus cladem ratus indigere consilio pleniore ad quendam compertae gravitatis educatorem senem protinus refert.

[4] Disturbed by the sudden evil, the adolescent, although he had at once shuddered at such a deed, nevertheless did not think it should be exasperated by the untimely severity of a denial, but softened by the delay of a cautious promise. Therefore he promises profusely and strongly urges that she take good heart and devote herself to refection and recovery, until by some departure of the father a free space would be granted for pleasure, and at once he withdraws himself from the noxious sight of the stepmother. And thinking that so great a calamity of the house required fuller counsel, he immediately reports it to a certain elderly tutor of proven gravity.

Nec quicquam diutina deliberatione tam salubre visum quam fuga celeri procellam fortunae saevientis evadere. Sed impatiens vel exiguae dilationis mulier ficta qualibet causa confestim marito miris persuadet artibus ad longissime dissitas festinare villulas. Quo facto maturae spei vesania praeceps promissae libidinis flagitat vadimonium.

Nor did anything, in prolonged deliberation, seem so salutary as to escape by swift flight the storm of raging Fortune. But the woman, impatient of even the slightest delay, on whatever feigned pretext, immediately persuades her husband by wondrous arts to hasten to little villas very far distant. This done, the madness of matured hope, headlong, clamors for the assignation of the promised lust.

Sed iuvenis, modo istud modo aliud causae faciens, exsecrabilem frustratur eius conspectum, quoad illa, nuntiorum varietate pollicitationem sibi denegatam manifesto perspiciens, mobilitate lubrica nefarium amorem ad longe deterius transtulisset odium. Et adsumpto statim nequissimo et ad omne facinus emancipato quodam dotali servulo perfidiae suae consilia communicat; nec quicquam melius videtur quam vita miserum privare iuvenem. Ergo missus continuo furcifer venenum praesentarium comparat idque vino diligenter dilutum insontis privigni praeparat exitio.

But the youth, now making this, now another, as a pretext, foils the abominable sight of her, until she, plainly perceiving from the variety of messengers that the promised thing was denied to her, by slippery fickleness had transferred her nefarious love into a far worse hatred. And immediately, having taken up a certain dowry-servant most wicked and emancipated to every crime, she communicates the counsels of her perfidy; and nothing seems better than to deprive the wretched youth of life. Therefore the gallows-bird, sent forth at once, procures an immediate poison, and, carefully diluted with wine, prepares it for the destruction of the innocent stepson.

[5] Ac dum de oblationis opportunitate secum noxii deliberant homines, forte fortuna puer ille iunior, proprius pessimae feminae filius, post matutinum laborem studiorum domum se recipiens, prandio iam capto sitiens repertum vini poculum, in quo venenum latebat inclusum, nescius fraudis occultae continuo perduxit haustu. Atque ubi fratri suo paratam mortem ebibit, examinis terrae procumbit, ilicoque repentina pueri pernicie paedagogus commotus ululabili clamore matrem totamque ciet familiam. Iamque cognito casu noxiae potionis varie quisque praesentium auctorem insimulabant extremi facinoris.

[5] And while the guilty men were deliberating among themselves about the opportune moment for administering the dose, by sheer chance that younger boy, the very son of the most wicked woman, returning home after the morning labor of studies, with the midday meal already taken and being thirsty, found a cup of wine in which the poison lay hidden enclosed, and, unaware of the concealed fraud, at once drained it in a single draught. And when he had drunk the death prepared for his brother, he, lifeless, sank to the ground, and immediately, the pedagogue, stirred by the boy’s sudden perdition, with an ululant cry summons the mother and the whole household. And now, the case of the noxious potion being recognized, each of those present, in various ways, was accusing someone as the author of the heinous crime.

Sed dira illa femina et malitiae novercalis exemplar unicum non acerba filii morte, non parricidii conscientia, infortunio domus, non luctu mariti vel aerumna funeris commota cladem familiae in vindictae compendium traxit, missoque protinus cursore, qui vianti marito domus expugnationem nuntiaret, ac mox eodem ocius ab itinere regresso personata nimia temeritate insimulat privigni veneno filium suum interceptum. Et hoc quidem non adeo mentiebatur, quod iam destinatam iuveni mortem praevenisset puer, sed fratrem iuniorem fingebat ideo privigni scelere peremptum, quod eius probrosae libidini, qua se comprimere temptaverat, noluisset succumbere. Nec tam immanibus contenta mendacis addebat sibi quoque ob detectum flagitium eundem illum gladium comminari.

But that dire woman, the unique exemplar of stepmotherly malice, moved neither by the bitter death of her son, nor by the consciousness of parricide, by the misfortune of the house, nor by her husband’s mourning or the burden of the funeral, turned the family’s catastrophe to the profit of vengeance; and straightway, having sent a runner to announce to her husband as he traveled the storming of the house, and soon, the same messenger having quickly returned from the road, masked with excessive temerity she charges that her son was cut off by the stepson’s poison. And in this indeed she was not altogether lying, since the boy had forestalled the death already destined for the youth; but she feigned that the younger brother had for this reason been done away with by the crime of the stepson: because he had refused to succumb to his disgraceful libido, with which he had tried to force himself upon him. Nor, content with such monstrous lies, did she fail to add that the same very sword was being threatened against herself also on account of the detected flagitious deed.

Tunc infelix duplici filiorum morte percussum magnis aerumnarum procellis aestuat. Nam et iuniorem incoram sui funerari videbat et alterum ob incestum parricidiumque capitis scilicet nimium mentitis lamentationibus ad extremum subolis impellebatur odium.

Then the unlucky man, struck by the double death of his sons, seethes in great storms of hardships. For he both saw the younger being buried before his own eyes, and toward the other—on account of incest and parricide, a capital charge to be sure—by excessively mendacious lamentations he was being driven to an ultimate hatred of his offspring.

[6] Vixdum pompae funebres et sepultura filii fuerant explicatae, et statim ab ipso eius rogo senex infelix, ora sua recentibus adhuc rigans lacrimis trahensque cinere sordentem canitiem, foro se festinus immittit. Atque ibi tum fletu tum precibus genua etiam decurionum contingens nescius fraudium pessimae mulieris in exitium reliqui filii plenis operabatur affectibus: illum incestum paterno thalamo, illum parricidam fraterno exitio et in comminata novercae caede sicarium. Tanta denique miseratione tantaque indignatione curiam sed et plebem maerens inflammaverat, ut remoto iudicandi taedio et accusationis manifestis probationibus et responsionis meditatis ambagibus cuncti conclamarint lapidibus obrutum publicum malum publice vindicari.

[6] Hardly had the funereal pomps and the sepulture of the son been unfolded, when immediately from his very pyre the unhappy old man, still wetting his face with fresh tears and dragging his gray hair, filthy with ash, hastens and thrusts himself into the forum. And there, both with weeping and with prayers, touching even the knees of the decurions, ignorant of the frauds of the most wicked woman, he was laboring with full affections toward the ruin of his remaining son: calling him incestuous with the paternal thalamus, calling him a parricide by his brother’s demise, and, in the threatened slaughter of the stepmother, a cutthroat. Finally, with such commiseration and such indignation he, mourning, had inflamed the curia and also the populace, that, the tedium of judging set aside, the proofs of the accusation being manifest, and the premeditated circumlocutions of the response, all cried out together that the public evil, overwhelmed with stones, be publicly avenged.

Magistratus interim metu periculi proprii, ne de parvis indignationis elementis ad exitium disciplinae civitatisque seditio procederet, partim decuriones deprecari, partim populares compescere, ut rite et more maiorum iudicio reddito et utrimquesecus allegationibus examinatis civiliter sententia promeretur, nec ad instar barbaricae feritatis vel tyrannicae impotentiae damnaretur aliquis inauditus et in pace placida tam dirum saeculo proderetur exemplum.

Meanwhile the magistrates, in fear for their own peril, lest from small elements of indignation sedition should proceed to the ruin of discipline and the city, were partly beseeching the decurions, partly restraining the populace, that, duly and in the custom of the ancestors, judgment being rendered and the allegations on both sides examined, the sentence might be merited civilly, nor, after the pattern of barbaric ferity or tyrannical wantonness, should someone be condemned unheard, and in a placid peace so dire an example be set forth to the age.

[7] Placuit salubre consilium et ilico iussus praeco pronuntiat, patres in curiam convenirent. Quibus protinus dignitatis iure consueta loca residentibus rursum praeconis vocatu primus accusator incendit. Tunc demum clamatus inducitur etiam reus, et exemplo legis Atticae Martiique iudicii causae patronis denuntiat praeco neque principia dicere neque miserationem commovere.

[7] The salubrious counsel was approved, and immediately the herald, on orders, proclaims that the fathers should assemble in the curia. When they at once, by the right of dignity, had taken their accustomed places, at the herald’s call the first accuser ignites the proceedings. Then at last the defendant too, having been summoned, is brought in; and, after the example of the Attic law and the judgment of Mars, the herald gives notice to the advocates of the case neither to deliver preliminaries nor to stir up pity.

Haec ad istum modum gesta compluribus mutuo sermocinantibus cognovi. Quibus autem verbis accusator urserit, quibus rebus diluerit reus ac prorsus orationes altercationesque neque ipse absens apud praesepium scire neque ad vos, quae ignoravi, possim enuntiare, sed quae plane comperi, ad istas litteras proferam.

I learned that these things had been done in such a manner from the mutual conversations of several. But with what words the accuser pressed, with what means the defendant diluted/refuted, and, in all, the orations and altercations—neither could I myself, being absent at the manger, know, nor can I enunciate to you the things which I did not know; but the things which I have plainly discovered I will bring forward in these letters.

Simul enim finita est dicentium contentio, veritatem criminum fidemque probationibus certis instructi nec suspicionibus tantam coniecturam permitti placuit, atque illum potissimum servum, qui solus haec ita gesta esse scire diceretur, sisti modis omnibus oportere. Nec tantillum cruciarius ille vel fortuna tam magni indicii vel confertae conspectu curiae vel certe noxia conscientia sua deterrimus, quae ipse finxerat, quasi vera adseverare atque adserere incipit: quod se vocasset indignatus fastidio novercae iuvenis, quod, ulciscens iniuriam, filiis eius mandaverit necem, quod promisisset grande silentii praemium, quod recusanti mortem sit comminatus, quod venenum sua manu temperatum dantum fratri reddiderit, quod ac criminis probationem reservatum poculum neclexisse (se) suspicatus sua postremum manu porrexit puero.

For at the same time as the contention of the speakers was finished, it was resolved—equipped with sure proofs—that the truth of the charges and credibility should rest on certain proofs, and that so great a conjecture should not be allowed to suspicions; and that that particular slave, who alone was said to know that these things had been done thus, ought by every method to be produced. Nor was that man under torture in the least deterred either by the momentousness of so great a piece of evidence, or by the sight of the thronged curia, or certainly by his own noxious conscience, from beginning to asseverate and assert as true the things which he himself had fabricated: that the young man, indignant at his stepmother’s disgust, had called him; that, avenging the injury, he had commissioned the slaying of her sons; that he had promised a great reward for silence; that, when he refused, he had threatened death; that he had delivered poison, prepared by his own hand, to be given to the brother; that also—suspecting (himself) to have neglected the cup reserved for the proof of the charge—he finally with his own hand proffered it to the boy.

Haec eximie nimis ad veritatis imaginem verberone illo simulata cum trepidatione proferente finitum est indicium.

These things, excessively fashioned to the image of truth, having been simulated by that lout, as he proffered them with trepidation, the inquest was brought to an end.

[8] Nec quisquam decurionum tam aequus remanserat iuveni, quin eum evidenter noxae compertum insui culleo pronuntiaret. Cum iam sententiae pares, cunctorum stilis ad unum sermonem congruentibus, ex more perpetuo in urnam aeream deberent coici, quo semel conditis calculis, iam cum rei fortuna transacto, nihil postea commutari licebat, sed mancipabatur potestas capitis in manum carnificis, unus e curia senior prae ceteris compertae fidi atque auctoritatis praecipuae medicus orificium urnae manu contegens, ne quis mitteret calculum tenere, haec ad ordinem pertulit: "Quod aetatis sum, vobis adprobatum me vixisse gaudeo, nec patiar falsis criminibus petito reo manifestum homicidium perpetrari nec vos, qui vire iurando adstrictis, inductos servuli mendacio peierare. Ipse non possum calcata numinum religione conscientiam meam fallens perperam pronuntiare.

[8] Nor had any one of the decurions remained so equitable toward the youth that he did not pronounce him, evidently ascertained in guilt, to be sewn into the culleus. When now the votes, equal, with the styli of all agreeing to one and the same wording, according to perpetual custom had to be cast into the bronze urn—where, once the calculi had been deposited, with the defendant’s fate now concluded, nothing thereafter was permitted to be changed, but the power over the life was delivered into the hand of the executioner—one man from the curia, an elder of proved fidelity and of outstanding authority, a physician, covering the mouth of the urn with his hand, lest anyone should cast a pebble in, holding it back, brought these matters before the order: “As to the age I am, I rejoice that it has been approved by you that I have lived; and I will not allow, with the defendant attacked by false charges, an evident homicide to be perpetrated, nor you, who are bound by the force of an oath, to be led by a little slave’s lie into perjury. I myself cannot—trampling underfoot the religion of the divinities, deceiving my own conscience—pronounce amiss.”

Ergo, ut res est, de me cognoscite.

Therefore, as the matter is, learn from me.

[9] Furcifer iste, venenum praesentarium comparare sollicitus centumque aureos solidos offerens pretium, me non olim convenerat, quod aegroto cuidam dicebat necessarium, qui morbi inextricabilis veterno vehementer implicitus vitate se cruciatui subtrahere gestiret. At ego, perspiciens malum istum verberonem blaterantem atque inconcinne causificantem certusque aliquod moliri flagitium, dedi quidem potionem, dedi; sed futurae quaestioni praecavens non statim pretium, quod offerebatur, accepi, aureorum nequam vel adulter reperiatur, in hoc ipso sacculo conditos eos anulo tuo praenota, donec altera die nummulario praesente comprobentur".

[9] That gallows-bird, anxious to procure an immediate-acting poison and offering as the price one hundred golden solidi, had not long ago come to an agreement with me, saying it was necessary for a certain sick man who, deeply entangled in the lethargy of an inextricable disease, desired to withdraw himself from the torment of life. But I, perceiving that wicked whipping-fellow babbling and making an incongruous plea, and being sure he was contriving some scandalous crime, did indeed give the potion, I gave it; but, taking precautions against a future inquest, I did not at once accept the price that was being offered—lest the gold pieces be found worthless or adulterated—mark those coins beforehand with your ring, placed in this very little purse, until on the next day, with a money-changer present, they are verified".

Sic inductus signavit pecuniam, quam exinde, ut iste repraesentatus est iudicio, iussi de meis aliquem curriculo taberna promptam adferre et en ecce perlatam coram exhibeo. Videat et suum sigillum recognoscat. Nam quem ad modum eius veneri frater insimulari potest, quod iste comparaverit?"

Thus induced he sealed the money, which thereafter, when this man was presented before the judgment, I ordered one of my people to bring at a run from the shop, ready at hand, and lo, behold, delivered here I exhibit it in your presence. Let him see and also recognize his own seal. For how can his brother be accused of that poison, which this man procured?"

[10] Ingens exinde verberonem corripit trepidatio et in vicem humani coloris succedit pallor infernus perque universa membra frigidus sudor emanabat: tunc pedes incertis alternationibus commovere, modo hanc, modo illam capitis partem scalpere et ore semiclauso balbuttiens nescio quas afannas effutire, ut eum nemo prorsus a culpa vacuum merito crederet; sed revalescente rursus astutia constantissime negare et accersere mendacii non desinit medicum. Qui praeter iudicii religionem cum fidem suam coram lacerari videret, multiplicato studio verberonem illum contendit redarguere, donec iussu magistratuum ministeria publica contrectatis nequissimi servi manibus anulum ferreum deprehensum cum signo sacculi conferunt, quae comparatio praecedentem roboravit suspicionem. Nec rota vel eculeus more Graecorum tormentis eius apparata iam deerant, sed offirmatus mira praesumptione nullis verberibus ac ne ipso quidem succumbit igni.

[10] From then on a huge trepidation seizes the lout, and in place of a human color there succeeds an infernal pallor, and through all his limbs a cold sweat was oozing: then to move his feet with uncertain alternations, now to scratch this, now that part of his head, and with his mouth half-closed, stammering to babble some I-know-not-what breathless nonsense, so that no one at all would with reason believe him free of blame; but, his cunning recovering strength again, he most steadfastly denies, and does not cease to summon a physician as an aid to his lie. He, setting aside the solemnity of the court, when he saw his own credibility being torn to pieces in public, with redoubled zeal strove to refute that lout, until, by order of the magistrates, the public officials, after the hands of the most wicked slave had been handled, discover an iron ring and compare it with the seal of the pouch; and this comparison strengthened the preceding suspicion. Nor were the wheel or the rack, after the Greek fashion, now lacking among the torments prepared for him; but, stiffened by wondrous presumption, he yielded to no beatings, nor even to the fire itself.

[11] Tunc medicus: "Non patiar" inquit "hercules, non patiar vel contra fas de innocente isto iuvene supplicium vos sumere vel hunc ludificato nostro iudicio poenam noxii facinoris evadere. Dabo enim rei praesenti evidens argumentum. Nam cum venenum peremptorium comparare pessimus iste gestiret nec meae sectae crederem convenire causas ulli praebere mortis nec exitio sed saluti hominum medicinam quaesitam esse didicissem, verens ne, si daturum me negassem, intempestiva repulsa viam sceleri subministrarem et ab alio quopiam exitiabilem mercatus hic potionem vel postremum gladio vel quovis telo nefas inchoatum perficeret, dedi venenum, sed somniferum, mandragoram illum gravedinis compertae famosum et morti simillimi soporis efficacem.

[11] Then the physician: “I will not allow,” he said, “by Hercules, I will not allow either that you, contrary to right, exact punishment from this innocent youth, or that this fellow, by trifling with our judgment, escape the penalty of a guilty deed. For I will give evident proof for the present case. For when this most-wicked man was eager to procure a peremptory poison, and I did not believe it to befit my sect to furnish causes of death to anyone, and had learned that medicine was sought not for destruction but for the salvation of men, fearing lest, if I refused to say I would give it, by an untimely rebuff I might supply a road to his crime and that he, having purchased from some other person a lethal potion, or finally by the sword or by any weapon whatsoever, might complete the abomination he had begun, I gave a poison—but a somniferous one—the mandragora, that plant famous for its proven drowsy heaviness, effective for a sleep most similar to death.”

Nec mirum desperatissimum istum latronem certum extremae poenae, quae more maiorum in eum competit, cruciatus istos ut leviores facile tolerare. Sed si vere puer meis temperatam manibus sumpsit potionem, vivit et quiescit et dormit et protinus marcido sopore discusso remeabit ad diem lucidam. Quod [sive peremtus est] si morte praeventus est, quaeratis licet causas mortis eius alias."

Nor is it a wonder that this most desperate brigand, certain of the extreme penalty which, by the custom of the ancestors, is due to him, should easily endure these tortures as lighter. But if truly the boy took the potion tempered by my hands, he lives and rests and sleeps, and straightway, when the languid sleep is shaken off, he will return to the lucid day. But if—[whether he has been slain]—if he has been overtaken by death, you are free to seek other causes of his death."

[12] Ad istum modum seniore adorante placuit, et itur confestim magna cum festinatione ad illud sepulchrum quo corpus pueri depositum iacebat. Nemo de curia, de optimatibus nemo ac ne de ipso quidem populo quisquam, qui non illuc curiose confluxerit. Ecce pater, suis ipse manibus coperculo capuli remoto, commodum discusso mortifero sopore surgentem postliminio mortis deprehendit filium eumque complexum artissime, verbis impar praesenti gaudio, producit ad populum.

[12] In this manner, as the elder was adoring, it was agreed, and they go forth immediately with great haste to that sepulchre where the body of the boy lay deposited. There was no one from the curia, none of the optimates, and not even anyone from the people, who did not flock thither eagerly. Behold, the father, having with his own hands removed the lid of the coffin, catches his son, just as, the death-bearing sleep having been shaken off, he was rising by a postliminium from death; and embracing him very tightly, his words unequal to the present joy, he brings him out before the people.

Atque ut erat adhuc feralibus amiculis instrictus atque obditus deportatur ad iudicium puer. Iamque liquido servi nequissimi atque mulieris nequioris patefactis sceleribus procedit in medium nuda veritas et novercae quidem perpetuum indicitur exsilium, servus vero patibulo suffigitur et omnium consensu bono medico sinuntur aurei, opportuni somni pretium. Et illius quidem senis famosa atque fabulosa fortuna providentiae divinae condignum accepit exitum, qui momento modico immo puncto exiguo post orbitatis periculum adulescentium duorum pater repente factus est.

And as he was still bound and shut in by funeral garments, the boy is carried off to judgment. And now, with the crimes of the most wicked slave and the more wicked woman plainly laid open, naked truth comes forth into the midst, and for the stepmother indeed perpetual exile is decreed, but the slave is fastened to the gibbet; and by the consent of all, gold pieces are granted to the good physician, the price of the opportune sleep. And indeed that old man’s famed and fabulous fortune received an outcome condign to divine providence, who in a short moment—nay, in a tiny instant—after the peril of bereavement was suddenly made the father of two youths.

[13] At ego tunc temporis talibus fatorum fluctibus volutabar. Miles ille, qui me nullo vendente comparaverat et sine pretio suum fecerat, tribuni sui praecepto debitum sustinens obsequium, litteras ad magnum scriptas principem Romam versus perlaturus, vicinis me quibusdam duobus servis fratribus undecim denariis vendidit. Hic erat dives admodum dominus.

[13] But I at that time was being tossed by such billows of fate. That soldier, who had acquired me with no one selling and had made me his own without a price, at his tribune’s command sustaining the due obedience, being about to carry letters written to the great Emperor toward Rome, sold me for eleven denarii to certain neighbors, two slave brothers. Their master was exceedingly rich.

At illorum alter pistor dulciarius, qui panes et mellita concinnabat edulia, alter cocus, qui sapidissimis intrimentis sucuum pulmenta condita vapore mollibat. Vnico illi contubernio communem vitam sustinebant meque ad vasa illa compluria gestanda praestinarant, quae domini religiones plusculas pererrantis variis usibus erant necessaria. Adsciscor itaque inter duos illos fratres tertius contubernalis, haud ullo tempore tam benivolam fortunam expertus.

But of those two, the one was a dulciary baker, who put together breads and honey-sweet edibles, the other a cook, who with the most savory condiments softened by vapor stews seasoned with juice. In a single contubernium they sustained a common life, and they had assigned me to carry those several vessels which were necessary for the various uses of the master who wandered through quite a few religious rites. I am therefore admitted among those two brothers as a third contubernal companion, having at no time experienced so benevolent a fortune.

Nam vespera post opiparas cenas eramque splendidissimo apparatus multas numero partes in cellulam suam mei solebant reportare domini: ille porcorum, pullorum, piscium et cuiusce modi pulmentorum largissima reliquias, hic panes, crustula, lucunculos, hamos, lacertulos et plura scitamenta mellita. Qui cum se refecturi clausa cellula balneas petissent, oblatis ego divinitus dapibus adfatim saginabar. Nec enim tam stultus eram tamque vere asinus, ut dulcissimi illis relictis cibis cenarem asperrimum faenum.

For in the evening, after sumptuous dinners, my masters were accustomed to carry back into their little cell many portions in number from the most splendid spread: that one the very abundant leftovers of porkers, chickens, fish, and pottages of whatever kind; this one breads, little cakes, little Lucanian sausages, hooks, little lizards, and many more honeyed delicacies. And when, with the cell shut, they had made for the baths to refresh themselves, I, with the banquet-dishes divinely proffered, was stuffed to the full. For I was not so foolish and so truly an ass as, leaving those most sweet foods, to dine on the very rough hay.

[14] Et diu quidem pulcherrime mihi furatrinae procedebat artificium, quippe adhuc timide et satis parce subripienti de tam multis pauciora nec illis fraudes ullas in asino suspicantibus. At ubi fiducia latenti pleniore capta partes opimas quasque devorabam et iucundiora eligens abligurribam dulcia, suspicio non exilis fratrum pupugit animos, et quanquam de me nihil etiam tum tale crederent, tamen cotidiani damni studiose vestigabant reum. Illi vero postremo etiam mutuo sese rapinae turpissimae criminabantur, iamque curam diligentiorem at acriorem custodelam et dinumerationem adhibebant partium. Tandem denique rupta verecundia sic alter alterum compellat:

[14] And for a long time indeed my craft of thievery was proceeding most beautifully for me, since as yet I, timidly and quite sparingly pilfering, took fewer things out of so many, and they suspected no frauds at all in an ass. But when, having seized upon a fuller confidence in my hiding, I was devouring the choicest portions and, choosing the more pleasant things, I was lapping up the sweets, no slight suspicion pricked the minds of the brothers; and although even then they would not believe anything of that sort about me, nevertheless they zealously tracked down the culprit for the daily loss. At last, indeed, they even mutually accused one another of the most shameful rapine, and now they were applying more diligent care and a sharper guard and a counting of the portions. Finally then, with modesty broken, thus the one addresses the other:

"At istud iam neque aequum ac ne humanum quidem cotidie te partes electiores surripere atque iis divenditis peculium latenter augere, de reliquis aequam vindicare divisionem, Si tibi denique societas ista displicet, possumus omnia quidem cetera fratres manere, ab isto tamen nexu communionis discidere. Nam videro in immensum damni procedentem querelam nutrire nobis immanem discordiam."

"But this now is neither equitable nor even human: that you daily surreptitiously steal the choicer shares and, having vended them, covertly augment your private peculium, and then claim an equal division from the remainder. If, in fine, this partnership displeases you, we can indeed remain brothers in all other respects, yet sever from that bond of communion. For I will see to it, with the complaint advancing to boundless loss, that we do not nourish a monstrous discord for ourselves."

Subicit alvis: "Laudo istam tuam mehercules et ipse constantiam, quod cotidie furatis clanculo partibus praevenisti querimoniam, quam diutissime sustinens tacitus ingemescebam, ne viderer rapinae sordidae meum fratrem arguere. Sed bene, quod utrimquesecus sermone prolato iacturae remedium quaeritur, ne silentio procedens simultas Eteocleas nobis contentiones pariat."

He adds: "By Hercules, I too praise that constancy of yours, that by daily, secretly stolen portions you forestalled the complaint, which, enduring as long as possible, I was silently groaning over, lest I should seem to accuse my brother of sordid rapine. But good it is that, with speech brought forth on both sides, a remedy for the loss is being sought, lest enmity proceeding in silence beget for us Eteoclean contentions."

[15] His et similibus altercati conviciis deierantur utrique nullam se prorsus fraudem, nullam denique subreptionem factitasse, sed plane debere cunctis artibus communis dispendii latronem inquiri; nam neque asinum, qui solus interesset, talibus cibis adfici posse, et tamen cotidie partis electiles comparere nusquam, nec utique cellulam suam tam immanes involare muscas, ut olim Harpyiae fuere, quae diripiebant Phineias dapes. Interea liberalibus cenis inescatus et humanis adfatim cibis saginatus corpus obesa pinguitie compleveram, corium arvina suculenta molliveram, pilum liberali nitore nutriverat. Sed iste corporis mei decor pudori peperit grande dedecus.

[15] After bandying insults of this sort and the like, both of them swear that they had committed absolutely no fraud, no subreption at all, but clearly that the thief of the common loss ought to be sought out by every art; for neither could the donkey, who alone was present, be affected by such foods, and yet the choice portions allotted each day were nowhere to be found, nor, surely, were such enormous flies flying into his little storeroom as once the Harpies did, who were snatching Phineus’s banquets. Meanwhile, lured by liberal dinners and crammed to sufficiency with human foods, I had filled my body with corpulent fatness, I had softened my hide with succulent suet, a generous sheen had nourished my coat. But this adornment of my body brought my modesty great disgrace.

Insolita namque tergoris vastitate commoti, faenum prorsus intactum cotidie remanere cernentes, iam totis ad me dirigunt animos. Et hora consueta velut balneas petituri clausis ex more foribus per quandam modicam cavernam rimantur me passim expositis epulis inhaerentem. Nec ulla cura iam damni sui habita mirati monstruosas asini delicias risu maximo dirumpuntur vocatoque uno et altero ac dein pluribus conservis gulam.

Stirred by the unusual vastness of my hide, seeing the hay remain utterly untouched day by day, they now direct all their attention to me. And at the accustomed hour, as if bound for the baths, with the doors closed according to custom, through a certain slight little opening they pry and espy me everywhere clinging to the dishes set out. And with no concern now had for their own loss, amazed at the monstrous delicacies of the ass, they burst into the greatest laughter, and, having called in one and then another, and thereafter several fellow-slaves, “what gluttony!”

Tantum denique ac tam liberatis cachinnus cunctos invaserat, ut ad aures quoque praetereuntis perveniret domini.

So great, in the end, and so unrestrained a guffaw had seized everyone, that it even reached the ears of the master as he was passing by.

[16] Sciscitatus denique, quid bonum rideret familia, cognito quod res erat, ipse quoque per idem prospiciens forarem delectatur eximie; ac dehinc risu ipse quoque latissimo adusque intestinorum dolorem redactum, iam patefacto cubiculo proxime consistens coram arbitratur. Nam et ego tandem ex aliqua parte mollius mihi renidentis fortunae contemplatum faciem, gaudio praesentium fiduciam mihi subministrante, nec tantillum commotus securus esitabam, quoad novitate spectaculi laetus dominus aedium duci me iussit, immo vero suis etiam ipse manibus ad triclinium perduxit mensaque posita omne genus edulium solidorum et inlibata fercula iussit adponi. At ergo quanquam iam bellule suffarcinatus, gratiosum commendatioremque me tamen ei fare cupiens esurienter exhibitas escas adpetebam.

[16] Finally, having inquired what good the household was laughing at, and, once he learned what the matter was, peering through the same bored hole he too is exceedingly delighted; and thereafter, he himself also, with very broad laughter brought right up to a pain of the entrails, with the bedchamber now thrown open, standing close by he inspects in person. For I too at last, in some part, contemplated the face of Fortune smiling more softly upon me, the joy of the present supplying me confidence, and, not the least bit agitated, I was munching securely, until the master of the house, glad at the novelty of the spectacle, ordered me to be led in—in fact, with his own hands he conducted me to the triclinium; and, the table set, he ordered every kind of solid edibles and untouched courses to be served. And so, although already prettily stuffed, wishing nevertheless to render myself gracious and more recommended to him, I hungrily attacked the foods that were presented.

Nam et quid potissimum abhorreret asino excogitantes scrupulose ad explorandam mansuetudinem id offerebant mihi, carnes lasere infectas, altilia pipere inspersa, pisces exotico iure perfusos. Interim convivium summo risu personabat. Quidam denique praesentes scurrula: "Date?

For they too, scrupulously devising what the ass would most especially abhor, in order to explore my mansuetude were offering me this: meats steeped in laser, fat poultry sprinkled with pepper, fish drenched in an exotic sauce. Meanwhile the banquet resounded with the greatest laughter. Finally, one of those present, a little buffoon: “Give?”

inquit "sodali huic quippiam meri."

he said, "Give this comrade a little neat wine."

Quod dictum dominus secutus: "Non adeo" respondit "absurde iocatus es, furcifer; valde enim fleri potest, ut contubernalis noster poculum quoque mulsi libenter adpetat." Et "heus", ait " puer, lautum diligenter ecce illum aureum cantharum mulso contempera et offer parasito meo; simul, quod ei praebiberim, commoneto."

Following up that remark, the master said: "Not so," he replied, "have you joked absurdly, you gallows-bird; for it can very well come to pass that our contubernal too will gladly go for a cup of mulsum." And "hey," he said, "boy, carefully wash that golden cantharus, mix it with mulsum and offer it to my parasite; at the same time, remind him that I have drunk of it beforehand."

Ingens exin oborta est epulonum exspectatio. Nec ulla tamen ego ratione conterritus, otiose ac satis genialiter contorta in modum linguae postrema labia grandissimum illum calicem uno haustum perduxi. Et clamor exsurgit consola voce cunctorum salute me prosequentium.

Immense thereafter there arose an expectation of the banqueters. Nor by any means, however, was I terrified; at ease and quite genially, with my hindmost lips twisted in the manner of a tongue, I carried that very great chalice through, drained in a single draught. And a clamor rises, with a voice in unison of all accompanying me with a health.

[17] Magno denique delibutus gaudio dominus, vocatis servis suis, emptoribus meis, iubet quadruplum restitui pretium meque cuidam acceptissimo liberto suo et satis peculiato magnam praefatus diligentiam tradidit. Qui me satis humane satisque comiter nutriebat et, quo se patrono commendationem faceret, studiosissime voluptates eius per meas argutias instruebat. Et primum me quidem mensam accumbere suffixo cubito, dein adluctari et etiam saltares sublatis primoribus pedibus perdocuit, quodque esset adprime mirabile, verbis nutum commodare, ut quod nollem relato, quod vellem deiecto capite monstrarem, sitiensque pocillatore respecto, ciliis alterna conivens, bibere flagitarem.

[17] The master, at last bathed in great joy, having called his servants—my buyers—orders the price to be restored fourfold, and, after a preface about great diligence, handed me over to a certain most acceptable freedman of his, well provided with peculium. He nourished me quite humanely and quite courteously, and, in order to secure for himself commendation with his patron, he most zealously equipped his pleasures by means of my arguties. And first he taught me indeed to recline at table with my elbow fixed, then to wrestle, and even to dance with my forefeet raised; and, what was supremely marvelous, to accommodate a nod to words, so that I might show what I did not want by drawing back my head, and what I wanted by lowering it; and, when thirsty, by looking back at the cupbearer, winking my eyelashes alternately, I should demand a drink.

Atque haec omnia perfacile oboediebam, quae nullo etiam monstrante scilicet facerem. Sed verebar ne, si forte sine magistro humano ritu ederem pleraque, rati saevum praesagium portendere, velet monstrum ostentumque me obtruncatum vulturiis opimum pabulum redderent. Iamque rumor publice crebruerat, quo conspectum atque famigerabilem meis miris artibus affeceram dominum: hic est, qui sodalem conivamque possidet asinum luctantem, asinum saltantem, asinum voces humanas intellegentem, sensum nutibus exprimentem.

And I obeyed all these things very easily, which, of course, I would do even with no one showing me. But I was afraid lest, if by chance I should perform most things without a trainer, in human fashion, they, thinking it portended a savage presage, might, as a prodigy and portent, cut me down and render me, slaughtered, a rich fodder for vultures. And now the rumor had spread publicly, by which I had made my master conspicuous and famous by my marvelous arts: this is he who possesses as a companion and dinner-companion an ass that wrestles, an ass that dances, an ass that understands human voices, expressing meaning by nods.

[18] Sed prius est ut vobis, quod initio facere debueram, vel nunc saltem referam, vis iste vel unde fuerit: Thiasus hoc enim nomine meus nuncupabatur dominus — oriundus patria Corintho, quod caput est totius Achaiae provinciae, ut eius prosapia atque dignitas postulabat, gradatim permensis honoribus quinquennali magistratui fuerat destinatus, et ut splendori capessendorum responderet fascium, munus gladiatorum triduani spectaculi pollicitus latius munificentiam suam porrigebat. Denique gloriae publicae studio tunc Thessaliam etiam accesserat nobilissimas feras et famosos inde gladiatores comparaturus, iamque ex arbitrio dispositis coemptisque omnibus domuitionem parabat. Spretis luculentis illis suis vehiculis ac posthabitis decoris raedarum carpentis, quae partim contecta partim revelata frustra novissimis trahebantur consequiis, equis etiam Thessalicis et aliis iumentis Gallicanis, quibus generosa suboles perhibet pretiosa dignitatem, me phaleris aureis et fucatis ephippis et purpureis tapetis et frenis argenteis et pictilibus balteis et tintinnabulis perargutis exornatum ipse residens amantissime nonnumquam commisit adfatur sermonibus atque inter alia pleraque summe se delectari profitebatur, quod haberet in me simul et convivam et vectorem.

[18] But first it is proper that I should tell you—what I ought to have done at the beginning—at least now, who that person was and whence he came: Thiasus—for by this name my master was called—born from his native country Corinth, which is the head of the whole province of Achaia, as his lineage and dignity demanded, having step by step traversed honors, had been destined for the quinquennial magistracy; and, that he might answer to the splendor of the fasces he was about to assume, having promised the munus of gladiators—a spectacle of three days—he was extending his munificence more broadly. Finally, in zeal for public glory he had then even gone into Thessaly to procure the most noble wild beasts and famous gladiators from there, and now, with everything arranged at his discretion and purchased, he was preparing for the journey home. Spurning those splendid vehicles of his and setting after the elegant raedae and carpenta—partly covered, partly open—which were being dragged to no purpose in the hindmost trains of the retinue, as well as Thessalian horses and other Gallic draft-animals, to which noble stock lends a costly distinction, he, me adorned with golden trappings and dyed saddles and purple rugs and silver bits and embroidered belts and very-tinkling bells, himself sitting most fondly would sometimes even address and accost with words, and among many other things professed himself supremely delighted that in me he possessed at once both a table-companion and a conveyance.

[19] At ubi partim terrestri partim maritimo itinere confecto Corinthum accessimus, magnae civium turbae confluebant, ut mihi videbatur, non tantum Thiasi studentes honori quam mei conspectus cupientes. Nam tanta etiam ibidem de me fama pervaserat, ut non mediocri questui praeposito illo meo fuerim. Qui cum multos videret nimio favore lusus meos spectare gestientes, obserata fore atque singulis eorum sorsus admissis, stipes acceptans non parvas summulas diurnas corradere consuerat.

[19] But when, a journey partly terrestrial and partly maritime having been completed, we approached Corinth, great crowds of citizens were flowing together, as it seemed to me, desiring not so much to do honor to Thiasus as to gain a sight of me. For so great a fama about me had spread there as well, that I had been for no mediocre profit to that overseer of mine. He, when he saw many, with excessive favor, eager to behold my games, with the door kept shut and admitting each of them apart one by one, taking small coins, was accustomed to scrape together no small daily little sums.

Fuit in illo conventiculo matrona quaedam pollens et opulens. Quae more ceterorum visum meum mercata ac dehinc multiformibus ludicris delectata per admirationem adsiduam paulatim in admirabilem mei cupidinem incidit; nec ullam vaesanae libidini medelam capiens ad instar asinariae Pasiphaae complexus meos ardenter exspectabat, grandi denique praemio cum altore depecta est noctis unius concubitum; at ille nequaquam <anxius, ecquid> posset de me suave provenire, lucro suo tantum contentus, adnuit.

There was in that little conventicle a certain matron, potent and opulent. Who, after the custom of the others having purchased my sight and thereafter delighted by multiform ludic entertainments, through assiduous admiration gradually fell into a marvelous desire for me; and, finding no remedy for her frenzied libido, in the likeness of asinine Pasiphae she ardently awaited my embraces; finally, for a great premium, having bargained with my keeper, she settled the coupling of a single night; but he, by no means <anxious, whether> anything pleasant could proceed from me, content only with his profit, assented.

[20] Iam demique cenati a triclinio domini decesseramus et iam dudum praestolantem cubiculo meo matronam offendimus. Dii boni, qualis ille quamque praeclarus apparatus! Quattuor eunuchi confestim pulvillis compluribus ventose tumentibus pluma delicata terrestrem nobis cubitum praestruunt, sed et strangula veste auro ac murice Tyrio depicta probe consternunt ac desuper brevibus admodum, sed satis copiosis pulvillis aliis nimis modicis, quis maxillas et cervices delicatae mulieres suffulcire consuerunt, superstruunt.

[20] Now at last, after dining, we had withdrawn from the master’s triclinium, and we found the matron, who had long been waiting, in my bedroom. Good gods, what and how splendid that apparatus! Four eunuchs immediately prepare for us a bed on the ground with several little cushions, windily swollen with delicate down; and they also properly cover it with a stragular garment embroidered with gold and Tyrian purple, and on top they pile very small indeed, yet quite numerous, other cushions—excessively small ones—with which delicate women are accustomed to prop their cheeks and necks.

Nec dominae voluptates diutina sua praesentia morati, clavis foribus facessunt. At intus cerei praeclara micantes luce nocturnas nobis tenebras inalbabant.

Not having delayed the lady’s pleasures by their prolonged presence, they make off, locking the doors with keys. But inside, candles, glittering with brilliant light, were whitening for us the nocturnal darkness.

[21] Tunc ipsa cuncto prorsus spoliata tegmine, taenia quoque, qua decoras devinxerat papillas, lumen propter adsistens, de stagneo vasculo multo sese perungit oleo balsamino meque indidem largissime perfricat, sed multo tanta impensius (cura) etiam nares perfundit meas. Tunc exosculata pressule, non qualia in lupanari solent basiola vel meretricum poscinummia vel adventorum negantinummia, sed pura atque sincera instruit et blandissimos adfatus: "Amo" et "Cupio" et "Te solum diligo" et "Sine te iam vivere nequeo" et cetera, quis mulieres et alios inducunt et suas testantur adfectationes, capistroque me prehensum more, quo didiceram, reclinat facile, quippe cum nil novi nihilque difficile facturus mihi viderer, praesertim post tantum temporis tam formosae mulieris cupiens amplexus obiturus; nam et vino pulcherrimo atque copioso memet madefeceram et ungento flagrantissimo prolubium libidinis suscitaram.

[21] Then she herself, utterly stripped of every covering, even the ribbon with which she had bound her comely breasts, standing beside the light, from a little tin vessel anoints herself with much balsamic oil and from the same source rubs me most lavishly, but with much more than so great (care) she even bathes my nostrils. Then, having kissed me closely, not the little kisses such as are wont in a brothel—the coin-demandings of harlots or the coin-denyings of new arrivals—but pure and sincere ones, she supplies, and the most coaxing blandishments: “I love,” and “I desire,” and “You alone I cherish,” and “Without you now I cannot live,” and the rest, by which women both induce others and attest their own affections; and, having taken me by the halter, in the manner which I had learned, she easily lays me back, since I seemed to myself about to do nothing new nor difficult, especially, after so long a time, being eager to undergo the embraces of so beautiful a woman; for I had soaked myself with most excellent and copious wine, and with a most fragrant unguent I had aroused the inclination of libido.

[22] Sed angebar plane non exili metu reputans, quem ad modum tantis tamque magis cruribus possem delicatam matronam inscendere vel tam lucida tamque tenera et lacte ac melle confecta membra duris ungulis complecti labiasque modicas ambroseo rore purpurantes tam amplo ore tamque enormi et saxeis dentibus deformi saviari, novissime quo pacto, quanquam ex unguiculis perpruriscens, mulier tam vastum genitale suscipet: heu me, qui dirrupta nobili femina bestiis obiectus munus instructurus sim mei domini! Molles interdum voculas et adsidua savia et dulces gannitus commorsicantibus oculis iterabat illa, et in summa: "Teneo te" inquit "teneo, meum palumbulum, meum passerem" et cum dicto vanas fuisse cogitationes meas ineptumque monstrat metus. Artissime namque complexa totum me prorsus, sed totum recepit.

[22] But I was plainly anguished with no slender fear, reckoning how, with such great and so much greater shanks, I could mount a delicate matron, or how I could embrace with hard hooves limbs so bright and so tender and fashioned of milk and honey, or kiss those modest lips purpling with ambrosial dew with so wide a mouth and deformed with stony teeth; and finally, in what way, though itching down to her little fingernails, the woman would receive so vast a genital member: alas for me, who, with a noblewoman torn apart, would be thrown to the beasts, to furnish a show for my master! Meanwhile she kept repeating soft little words and continual kisses and sweet cooings, with eyes that were nibbling; and, in sum: “I hold you,” she said, “I hold you, my little dove, my sparrow”—and with the word she shows my thoughts had been vain and my fear foolish. For clasping me most tightly, she received me wholly—yes, wholly.

Illa vero quotiens ei parcens nates recellebam, accedens totiens nisu rabido et spinam prehendens meam adplicitiore nexu inhaerebat, ut hercules etiam deesse mihi aliquid ad supplendam eius libidinem crederem, nec Minotauri matrem frustra delectatam putarem adultero mugiente. Iamque operosa et pervigili nocte transacta, vitata lucis conscientia facessit mulier condicto pari noctis futurae pretio.

But she, indeed, as often as, sparing her, I drew back my buttocks, so often, approaching with rabid effort and seizing my spine, she clung with a more adpressed bond, so that, by Hercules, I even believed something was lacking to me for supplying her libido, nor would I think the mother of the Minotaur had been pleased in vain by her mooing adulterer. And now, with a laborious and pervigil night passed, avoiding the awareness of the light, the woman withdraws, with an agreement for an equal price for the night to come.

[23] Nec gravate magister meus voluptates ex eius arbitrio largiebatur partim mercedes amplissimas acceptando, raptim novum spectaculum domino praeparando. Incunctanter ei denique libidinis nostrae totam detegit scaenam. At ille liberto magnifice munerato destinat me spectaculo publico.

[23] Nor did my master begrudgingly, at her discretion, lavish pleasures, partly by accepting most ample fees, swiftly preparing a new spectacle for the lord. At last, unhesitatingly, he unveils to him the whole scene of our libido. But he, the freedman magnificently remunerated, assigns me to a public spectacle.

Et quoniam neque egregia illa uxor mea propter dignitatem neque prorsus ulla alis inveniri potuerat grandi praemio, quae mecum incoram publicans pudicitiam populi caveam frequentaret. Eius poenae talem cognoveram fabulam.

And since neither that distinguished wife of mine, on account of her dignity, nor indeed could any other at all be found, even for a large reward, who would, in my company and openly, publishing pudicity, frequent the people’s cavea. Of that penalty I had come to know such a tale.

Maritum habuit, cuius pater peregre proficiscens mandavit uxoris suae, matri eiusdem iuvenis — quod enim sarcina praegnationis oneratam eam relinquebat — ut, si sexus sequioris edidisset fetum, protinus quo esset editum necaretur. At illa, per absentiam mariti nata puella, insita matribus pietate praeventa descivit ab obsequio mariti eamque prodidit vicinis alumnandam, regressoque iam marito natam necatamque nuntiavit. Sed ubi flos aetatis nuptialem virgini diem flagitabat nec ignaro marito dotare filiam pro natalibus quibat, quod solum potuit, filio suo tacitum secreto aperuit.

She had a husband, whose father, setting out abroad, gave a charge to his own wife, the mother of that same youth — for he was leaving her weighed down with the burden of pregnancy — that, if she should bring forth an offspring of the weaker sex, it should straightway, as soon as it was brought forth, be killed. But she, a girl having been born during her husband’s absence, forestalled by the piety inborn in mothers, defected from obedience to her husband and made her over to the neighbors to be fostered, and, when her husband had now returned, reported that she had been born and killed. But when the flower of age was demanding for the virgin her nuptial day, and she could not, with her husband not ignorant, endow a daughter on the score of her birth, what alone she could do, she quietly disclosed the unspoken matter to her son in secret.

Nam et oppido verebatur ne quos casu, caloris iuvenalis impetu lapsus, nescius nesciam sororem incurreret. Sed pietatis spectatae iuvenis et matris obsequium et sororis officium religiose dispensat et arcanis domus venerabilis silentii custodiae traditis, plebeiam facie tenus praetendes humanitatem, sic necessarium sanguinis sui munus adgreditur ut desolatam domus suae tutela receptaret ac mox artissimo multumque sibi dilecto contubernali, largius de proprio dotem, liberalissime traderet.

For indeed he greatly feared lest by chance, swept along by the impulse of youthful heat, he, unknowing, might collide with his equally unknowing sister. But the young man, of proved piety, religiously arranges both the obsequy owed to his mother and the office owed to his sister, and, the arcana of the venerable house having been consigned to the custody of silence, putting forward in appearance only a plebeian humanity, he thus undertakes the necessary munus toward his own blood, so that he might receive back into the tutelage of his house the desolate woman; and soon to a most intimate contubernal, much beloved by him, he most liberally would hand over a dowry, more ample out of his own resources.

[24] Sed haec bene atque optime plenaque cum sanctimonia disposita feralem Fortunae nutum latere non potuerunt, cuius instinctu domum iuvenis protinus se direxit saeva Rivalitas. Et illico haec eadem uxor eius, quae nunc bestiis propter haec ipsa fuerat addicta, coepit puellam velut aemulam tori succubamque primo suspicari, dehinc detestari, dehinc crudelissimis laqueis mortis insidiari, Tali denique comminiscitur facinus.

[24] But these things, arranged well and most excellently and full of sanctity, could not lie hidden from the funereal nod of Fortune, at whose instigation savage Rivalry straightway directed herself to the young man’s house. And immediately this same wife of his, who now had been consigned to the beasts on account of these very things, began to suspect the girl as a rival of the marriage-bed and a succuba; then to detest her; then to set ambush with the most cruel snares of death. Finally she devises such a crime.

Anulo mariti surrepto rus profecta mittit quendam servulum sibi quidem fidelem, sed de ipsa Fide pessime merentem, qui puellae nuntiaret quod eam iuvenis profectus ad villulam vocarent ad sese, addito ut sola et sine ullo comite quam maturissime perveniret. Et ne qua forte nasceretur veniendi cunctatio, tradit anulum marito subtractum, qui monstratus fidem verbis adstipularetur. At illa mandatu fratris obsequens — hoc enim nomen sola sciebat — respecto etiam signo eius, quod offerebatur, naviter, ut praeceptum fuerat, incomitata festinabat.

Having surreptitiously taken her husband’s ring, she set out for the countryside and sends a certain servant-lad, indeed loyal to her, but most ill‑deserving toward Faith herself, to announce to the girl that the young man, having gone to the little villa, was summoning her to himself, with the addition that she should arrive as quickly as possible, alone and without any companion. And lest perchance any hesitation about coming should arise, she hands over the ring taken from her husband, which, when shown, would corroborate the credibility of the words. But she, obedient to the command of her “brother” — for this was the only name she knew — and having regard also to his token which was being proffered, eagerly, as had been ordered, unaccompanied, made haste.

Sed ubi fraudis extremae lapsa decipulo laqueos insidiarum accessit, tunc illa uxor egregia sororem mariti libidinosae furiae stimulis efferata primum quidem nudam flagris ultime verberat, dehinc quod res erat, clamantem quodque frustra paelicatus indignatione bulliret fratrisque nomen saepius iterantem velut mentitam atque cuncta fingentem titione candenti inter media femina detruso crudelissimae necavit.

But when, having slipped into the trap of utmost fraud, she came upon the snares of the ambush, then that egregious wife, maddened by the goads of libidinous fury against her husband’s sister, first indeed scourges her naked with whips to the uttermost; then—just as the case was—her crying out, and in vain seething with indignation at being branded a mistress, and repeatedly uttering her brother’s name, as if she were lying and inventing everything, she most cruelly killed her by thrusting a glowing brand between the middle of her thighs.

[25] Tunc acerbae mortis exciti nuntiis frater et maritus accurrunt variisque lamentationibus defletam puellam tradunt sepulturae. Nec iuvenis sororis suae mortem tam miseram et qua minime par erat inlatam aequo quivit animo, sed medullitus dolore commotus acerrimaeque bilis noxio furore perfusus exin flagrantissimi febribus ardebat, ut ipsi quoque iam medela videretur esse necessaria. Sed uxor, quam iam pridem nomen uxoris cum fide perdiderat, medicum convenit quendam notae perfidiae, qui iam multarum palmarum spectatus proeliis magna dexterae suae tropaea numerabat, eique protinus quinquaginta promittit sestertia, ut ille quidem momentarium venenum venderet, ipsa autem emeret mortem mariti sui.

[25] Then, roused by the messages of the bitter death, the brother and the husband run up and, with various lamentations, hand over the girl, bewailed, to burial. Nor could the young man bear with equable spirit the death of his sister, so wretched and inflicted in a way least fitting; but stirred to the marrow by grief and suffused with the noxious fury of very bitter bile, thereafter he burned with the fevers most blazing, so that to him also now a remedy seemed necessary. But the wife, who long since had lost the name of wife together with fidelity, meets a certain physician of notorious perfidy—who, already proven in many battles of palms, was counting great trophies of his right hand—and to him forthwith promises fifty sestertia, that he indeed would sell a momentary poison, while she herself would buy the death of her husband.

Quo compecto simulatur necessaria praecordiis leniendis bilive subtrahendae illa praenobilis potio, quam sacram doctiores nominant, sed in eius vicem subditur alia Proserpinae sacra Saluti. Iamque praesente familia et nonnullis amicis et adfinibus aegroto medicus poculum probe temperatum manu sua porrigebat.

With this compact concluded, that most noble potion—necessary for soothing the vitals and for subtracting bile—which the more learned style “sacred,” is simulated; but in its stead another is substituted, sacred to Proserpina, to the detriment of Health. And now, with the household present and some friends and kin, the physician was proffering to the sick man, with his own hand, a cup well tempered.

[26] Sed audax illa mulier, ut simul et conscium sceleris amoliretur et quam desponderat pecuniam lucraretur, coram detento calice: "Non prius", inquit "medicorum optime, non prius carissimo mihi marito trades istam potionem quam de ea bonam partem hauseris ipse. Vnde enim scio an noxium in eam lateat venenum? Quae res utique te tam prudentem tamque doctum virum nequaquam offendet, si religiosa uxor circa salutem mariti sollicita necessariam adfero pietatem."

[26] But that audacious woman, so that at the same time she might both remove the accomplice of the crime and lucrate the money which she had promised, in everyone’s presence, with the chalice being held back, said: "Not before, best of physicians, not before will you hand that potion to my dearest husband than after you yourself have drained a good portion of it. For whence should I know whether a noxious poison lies hidden in it? This matter assuredly will by no means offend you, a man so prudent and so learned, if I, a religious wife, solicitous about my husband’s health, bring the necessary piety."

Qua mira desperatione truculentae feminae repente perturbatus medicus excussusque toto consilio et ob angustiam temporis spatio cogitandi privatus, antequam trepidatione aliqua vel cunctatione ipsa daret malae conscientiae suspicionem, indidem de potione gustavit ampliter. Quam quidem secutus adulescens etiam, sumpto calice, quod offerebatur hausit. Ad istum modum praesenti transacto negotio medicus quam celerrime domum remeabat, salutifera potione pestem praecedentis veneni festinans extinguere.

At this astonishing desperation of the truculent woman, the physician, suddenly perturbed and shaken out of his whole counsel, and, because of the narrowness of time, deprived of a space for thinking, before by any trepidation or by cunctation itself he might give suspicion to an evil conscience, from that same potion tasted copiously. The adolescent too, following this, the cup having been taken up, drained what was being offered. In this way, the present business having been transacted, the physician was returning home as swiftly as possible, hastening to extinguish by a salutiferous potion the pest of the preceding poison.

Nec eum obstinatione sacrilega, qua semel coeperat, truculenta mulier ungue latius a se discere passa est — "priusquam" inquit "digesta potione medicinae proventus appareat" — sed aegre precibus et ostentationibus eius multum ac diu fatigata tandem abire concessit. Interdum perniciem caenam totis visceribus furentem medullae penitus adtraxerant, multum denique saucius et gravedine somnulenta iam demersus domum pervadit aegerrime. Vixque enarratis cunctis ad uxorem mandato saltem promissam mercedem mortis geminatae deposceret, sic elisum violenter spectatissimus medicus effundit spiritum.

Nor did the ferocious woman, with the sacrilegious obstinacy with which she had once begun, allow him to depart from her by more than a nail’s breadth — “before,” she said, “the potion has been digested and the outcome of the medicine appears” — but, with difficulty, much and long wearied by his prayers and ostentations, at last she permitted him to go. Meanwhile the marrow had drawn deep within the ruinous supper, raging through all his entrails; and at last, much wounded and now sunk in a drowsy heaviness, he made his way home with the greatest difficulty. And scarcely, after everything had been reported to his wife, did he, by a message at least, demand the promised fee for the doubled death; thus, violently dashed down, the most distinguished physician poured out his spirit.

[27] Nec ille tamen iuvenis diutius vitam tenuerat, sed inter fictas mentitasque lacrimas uxoris pari casu mortis fuerat extinctus. Iamque eo sepulto, paucis interiectis diebus, quis feralia mortuis litantur obsequia, uxor medici pretium geminae mortis petens aderat. Sed mulier usquequaque sui similis, fidei supprimens faciem, praetendes imaginem, blandicule respondit et omnia prolixe adcumulateque pollicetur et statutum praemium sine mora se reddituram constituit, modo pauxillum de ea potione largiri sibi vellet ad incepti negotii persecutionem.

[27] Nor had that young man, however, held on to life for longer, but amid the feigned and counterfeit tears of his wife he had been extinguished by an equal accident of death. And now, when he was buried, a few days having intervened, on which funereal obsequies are offered to the dead, the physician’s wife appeared, seeking the price of the double death. But the woman, everywhere like herself, suppressing the face of good faith and proffering its image, answered coaxingly and promises all things liberally and in full measure, and declared that she would render the stipulated reward without delay—provided only that she would be willing to bestow upon her a very little of that potion for the prosecution of the undertaking begun.

Quid pluribus? Laqueis fraudium pessimarum uxor inducta medici facile consentit et, quo se gratiorem locupleti feminae faceret, properiter domo petitam totam prorsus veneri pyxidem mulieri tradidit. Quae grandem scelerum nancta materiam longe lateque cruentas suas manus porrigit.

Why say more? The physician’s wife, enticed by the snares of the most wicked deceits, readily consents; and, in order to make herself more gratifying to the wealthy woman, she quickly handed over to her, fetched from home, the whole casket for Venus. She, having found great material for crimes, stretches her blood-stained hands far and wide.

[28] Habebat filiam parvulam de marito, quem nuper necaverat. Huic infantulae quod leges necessariam patris successionem deferrent, sustinebat aegerrime inhiansque toto filiae patrimonio inminebat et capiti. Ergo certa defunctorum liberorum matres sceleratas hereditates excipere, talem parentem praebuit, pro tempore et uxorem medici simul et suam filiam venero eodem percutit.

[28] She had a very little daughter by the husband whom she had lately slain. For this little infant, because the laws were assigning the necessary succession of the father, she could scarcely endure it; and, gaping after it, she was looming over both her daughter’s whole patrimony and her life. Therefore, certain that mothers of deceased children receive criminal inheritances, she showed herself such a parent: as the occasion required, she struck down with the same poison both the physician’s wife and her own daughter.

Sed parvulae quidem tenuem spiritum et delicata ac tenera praecordia conficit protinus viris infestum, at uxor medici, dum noxiis ambagibus pulmones eius pererrat tempestas detestabilis potionis, primum suspicata, quod res erat, mox urgente spiritu iam certo certior contendit ad ipsam praesidis domum magnoque fidem eius protestata clamore et populi concitato tumultu, utpote tam immania detectura flagitia, efficit, statim sibi simul et domus et aures praesidis patefierent. Iamque ab ipso exordio crudelissimae mulieris cunctis atrocitatibus diligenter expositis, repente mentis nubilo turbine correpta semihiantes adhuc compressit labias et, attritu dentium longo stridore reddito, ante ipso praedis pedes examinis corruit. Nec ille vir, alioquin exercitus, tam multiforme facinus excetrae venenatae dilatione languida passus marcescere confestim cubiculariis mulieris adtractis vi tormentorum veritatem eruit atque illam, minus quidem quam merebatur, sed quod dignus cruciatus alius excogitari non poterat, certe bestiis obiciendam pronuntiavit.

Straightway, indeed, the venom, hostile, dispatches the little girl’s slight breath and her delicate and tender vitals; but the physician’s wife, while the detestable tempest of the noxious potion wanders through her lungs by harmful meanderings, first suspecting—as the fact was—soon, her breath pressed and now more surely certain, hastens to the governor’s very house, and, with a great outcry attesting her credibility, and with the people’s tumult stirred up—inasmuch as she was about to uncover such monstrous flagitia—procures that at once both the house and the ears of the governor be opened to her. And now, with all the atrocities of that most cruel woman set forth diligently from the very beginning, suddenly, seized by a whirlwind-cloud of madness, she compressed lips still half-gaping, and, a long screech being produced by the grinding of her teeth, fell lifeless before the very feet of the governor. Nor did that man—experienced otherwise—allow such a multiform crime of the venomous viper to wither by sluggish delay: forthwith, the woman’s chamber-servants having been seized, by the force of tortures he dug out the truth, and he pronounced that she—less indeed than she deserved, but since no other worthy punishment could be devised—surely be thrown to the beasts.

[29] Talis mulieris publicitus matrimonium confarreaturus ingentique angore oppido suspensus exspectabam diem muneris, saepius quidem mortem mihimet volens consciscere, priusquam scelerosae mulieris contagio macularer vel infamia publici spectaculi depudescerem. Sed privatus humana manu, privatus digitis, ungula rutunda atque mutila gladium stringere nequaquam poteram. Plane tenui specula solabar clades ultimas, quod ver in ipso ortu iam gemmulis floridis cuncta depingeret et iam purpureo nitore praeta vestiret et commodum dirrupto spineo tegmine spirantes cinnameos odores promicarent rosae, quae me priori meo Lucio redderent.

[29] About to solemnize publicly the matrimony of such a woman by confarreatio, and, exceedingly suspended with huge anguish, I was awaiting the day of the spectacle, indeed more than once wishing to decree death upon myself, before I should be stained by the contagion of the wicked woman or be shamed by the infamy of the public spectacle. But deprived of a human hand, deprived of fingers, with a rounded and maimed hoof I was by no means able to draw a sword. Clearly I was consoling my utmost disasters with a slender prospect, because spring at its very rising was now painting all things with flowery buds and now clothing the meadows with purple brilliance, and just then, the thorny covering having been burst, the roses, breathing cinnamon odors, would flash forth—roses which would restore me to my former self, Lucius.

Dies ecce numeri destinatus aderat. Ad conseptum caveae prosequente populo pompatico favore deducor. Ad dum ludicris scaenicorum choreis primitiae spectaculi dedicantur, tantisper ante portam constitutus pabulum laetissimi graminis, quod in ipso germinabat aditu, libens adfectabam, subinde curiosos oculos patente porta spectaculi prospectu gratissimo reficiens.

Behold, the day destined by the reckoning was at hand. I am led down to the fenced enclosure of the cage, the people escorting me with pompatic favor. And while, with the ludic dances of the stage-players, the first-fruits of the spectacle are being dedicated, meanwhile, stationed before the gate, I gladly made for the fodder of the very lush grass which was sprouting in the very entryway, from time to time refreshing my curious eyes, the gate standing open, with the most pleasing prospect of the show.

Nam puelli puellaeque virenti florentes aetatula, forma conspicui veste nitidi, incessu gestuosi, Graecanicam saltaturi pyrricam dispositis ordinationibus decoros ambitus inerrabant nunc in orbem rotatum flexuosi, nunc in obliquam seriem conexi et in quadratum patorem cuneati et in catervae discidium separati. Ad ubi discursus reciproci multinodas ambages tubae terminalis cantus explicuit, aulaeo subductu et complicitis siparis scaena disponitur.

For little boys and girls in verdant, blooming youth, conspicuous in beauty, bright in dress, showy in gait and gesture, about to dance the Greek Pyrrhic, with their dispositions set in order, were wandering through decorous circuits—now sinuous into a whirled orbit, now linked into an oblique series, now wedged into a spacious square, and now separated into a troop’s division. And when the song of the terminal trumpet had unfolded the many-knotted meanders of their reciprocal courses, with the curtain drawn up and the stage-screens folded, the scene is arranged.

[30] Erat mons ligneus, ad instar incliti montis illius, quem vates Homerus Idaeum cecinit, sublimi instructus fabrica, consitus virectis et vivis arboribus, summo cacumine, de manibus fabri fonti manante, fluvialis aquas eliquans. Capellae pauculae tondebant herbulas et in modum Paridis, Phrygii pastoris, barbaricis amiculis umeris defluentibus, pulchre indusiatus simulabat magisterium. Adest luculentus puer nudus, nisi quod ephebica chlamida sinistrum tegebat umerum, flavis crinibus usquequaque conspicuus, et inter conas eius aureae pinnulae colligatione simili sociatae prominebant; quem [caduceum] et virgula Mercurium indicabat, Is saltatorie procurrens malumque bracteis inauratum dextra gerens (adulescentis), qui Paris videbatur, porrigit, qui mandaret Iuppiter nutu significans, et protinus gradum scitule referens et conspectu facessit.

[30] There was a wooden mountain, after the likeness of that renowned mountain which the vates Homer sang as Idaean, equipped with a lofty fabric, planted with greenswards and living trees, with a spring at the highest peak, by the craftsman’s hands flowing, decanting fluvial waters. A few little she-goats were cropping the herblets, and, in the manner of Paris, the Phrygian shepherd, with barbaric little mantles streaming from his shoulders, handsomely tunic-clad, he was simulating the craft. There is present a splendid boy, naked, save that an ephebic chlamys covered his left shoulder, conspicuous everywhere for his blond hair, and among his locks little golden pinions, joined together with a like fastening, projected; whom a [caduceus] and wand indicated to be Mercury. He, running forward in a dancer’s fashion and bearing in his right hand an apple gilded with gold leaf (of the young man), which seemed Paris, extends it to him, Jupiter by a nod signifying to whom he should entrust it; and straightway, neatly retracing his step, he withdraws from sight.

Insequitur puella vultu honesta in deae Iunonis speciem similis: nam et caput stringebat diadema candida, ferebat et sceptrum. Inrupit alia, quam putares Minervam, caput contecta fulgenti galea — et oleaginea corona tegebatur ipsa galea — clypeum attollens et hastam quatiens et qualis illa, cum pugnat.

A maiden follows, comely of countenance, like in the semblance of the goddess Juno: for she both encircled her head with a white diadem, and she carried a scepter. Another burst in, whom you would think Minerva, her head covered with a gleaming helmet — and the helmet itself was covered by an olive-wreath — lifting a shield and brandishing a spear, and just such as she is when she fights.

[31] Super has introcessit alia, visendo decore praepollens, gratia coloris ambrosei designans Venerem, qualis fuit Venus, cum fuit virgo, nudo et intecto corpore perfectam formositatem professa, nisi quod tenui pallio bombycino inumbrabat spectabilem pubem. Quam quidem laciniam curiosulus ventus satis amanter nunc lasciviens reflabat, ut dimota pateret flos aetatulae, nunc luxurians aspirabat, ut adhaerens pressule membrorum voluptatem graphice liniaret. Ipse autem color deae diversus in speciem, corpus candidum, quod caleo demeat, amictus caerulus, quod mari remeat.

[31] Over these there stepped forward another, preeminent in visible comeliness, by the grace of an ambrosial hue designating Venus—such as Venus was when she was a maiden—professing perfect beauty with body nude and uncovered, except that with a thin silken pallium she cast a shadow over the visible pubic region. That hem, indeed, a rather curious little wind quite lovingly now, wantoning, blew back, so that, displaced, the bloom of tender age might lie open; now, luxuriating, it breathed upon it, so that, clinging snugly, it might graphically delineate the voluptuousness of her limbs. But the goddess’s very color varied in aspect: the body was gleaming white, since it descends from heaven; the garment was cerulean, since it returns to the sea.

Iam singulas virgines, quae deae putabantur, (sui tutabantur) comites, Iunonem quidem Castor et Pollux, quorum capita cassides ovatae stellarum apicibus insignes contegebant, sed et isti Castores erant scaenici pueri. Haec puella varios modulos Iastia concinente tibia procedens quieta et inadfectata gesticulatione nutibus honesti pastori pollicetur, si sibi praemium decoris addixisset, sese regnum totius Asiae tributuram. At illam quam cultus armorum Minervam fecerat duo pueri muniebant, proeliaris deae comites armigeri, Terror et Metus, nudis insultantes gladiis.

By now each maiden, who was thought a goddess, (was being protected by her own) companions, Juno indeed by Castor and Pollux, whose heads ovate helmets, distinguished with the tips of stars, covered—yet these “Castors” too were theatrical boys. This girl, as the Iastian pipe chimed various measures, advancing with quiet and unaffected gesticulation, by nods promises to the honest shepherd that, if he should award to her the prize of beauty, she will grant him the kingdom of all Asia. But her whom the accoutrement of arms had made Minerva two boys were guarding, armor-bearing companions of the warlike goddess, Terror and Fear, leaping with naked (unsheathed) swords.

At pone tergum tibice Dorium canebat bellicosum et permiscens bombis gravibus tinnitus acutos in modum tubae saltationis agilis vigorem suscitabat. Haec inquieto capite et oculis in aspectum minacibus citato et intorto genere gesticulationis alacer demonstrabat Paridi, si sibi formae victoriam tradidisset, fortem tropaeisque bellorum inclitum suis adminiculis futurum.

But behind her a flute-player was playing a warlike Dorian mode, and, mixing heavy booms with sharp clangs in the manner of a trumpet, was arousing the vigor of agile dancing. She, with a restless head and eyes menacing in aspect, with a quick and twisted kind of gesticulation, briskly indicated to Paris that, if he should hand over to her the victory of beauty, he would be brave and renowned with the trophies of wars by her aid.

[32] Venus ecce cum magno favore caveae in ipso meditullio scaenae, circumfuso populo laetissimorum, dulce subridens constitit amoene: illos teretes et lacteos puellos diceres tu Cupidines veros de caelo vel mari commodum involasse; nam et pinnulis et sagittulis et habitu cetero formae praeclare congruebant et velut nuptialis apulas obiturae dominae coruscis praelucebant facibus. Et influunt innuptarum puellarum decorae subole, hinc Gratiae gratissimae, inde Horae pulcherrimae, quae iaculis foris serti et soluti deam suam propitiantes scitissimum construxerant chorum, dominae voluptatum veris coma blandientes. Iam tibiae multiforabiles cantus Lydios dulciter consonant.

[32] Lo, Venus, with great favor of the cavea, stood charmingly in the very middle of the stage, sweetly smiling, with the crowd of the most joyful poured around; those smooth and milky-white boys you would say were true Cupids, having just flown in from heaven or sea; for with little wings and little arrows and with the rest of their attire they matched the type excellently, and, as if to attend their lady’s nuptial banquet, they shone ahead with flashing torches. And there flows in the comely brood of unmarried maidens, here the most gracious Graces, there the most beautiful Hours, who, some wreathed and others with hair unbound, propitiating their goddess, had constructed a most skillful chorus, with springtime locks flattering the lady of pleasures. Now the multi-holed pipes sound Lydian songs sweetly in concord.

Quibus spectatorum pectora suae mulcentibus, longe suavior Venus placide commoveri cunctantique lente vestigio et leniter fluctuante spinula et sensim adnutante capite coepit incedere mollique tibiarum sono delicatis respondere gestibus et nunc mite coniventibus nunc acre comminantibus gestire pupulis et nonnumquam saltare solis oculis. haec ut primum ante iudicis conspectum facta est, nisu brachiorum polliceri videbatur, si fuisset deabus ceteris antelata, daturam se nuptam Paridi forma praecipuam suique consimilem. Tunc animo volenti Phrygius iuvenis malum, quod tenebat, aureum velut victoriae calculum puellae tradidit.

While these things were soothing the hearts of the spectators, a far sweeter Venus began to be gently stirred and to advance with a hesitating, slow step, her little spine softly undulating and her head gradually nodding assent; she began to answer the soft sound of the pipes with delicate gestures, and to frolic with her pupils—now gently half-closing, now keenly threatening—and sometimes to dance with her eyes alone. When this was first done before the judge’s gaze, by the poise of her arms she seemed to promise that, if she were preferred before the other goddesses, she would give to Paris a bride preeminent in beauty and like to herself. Then the Phrygian youth, with a willing spirit, handed to the girl the apple he was holding, golden, as though a calculus of victory.

[33] Quid ergo miramini, vilissima capita, immo forensia pecora, immo vero togati vulturii, si totis nunc iudices sententias suas pretio nundinantur, cum rerum exordio inter deos et homines agitatum indicium corruperit gratia et originalem sententiam magni Iovis consiliis electus iudex rusticanus et opilio lucro libidinis vendiderit cum totis etiam suae stirpis exitio? Sic hercules et aliud sequensque iudicium inter inclito Achivorum duces celebratum, [vel] eum falsis insimulationibus eruditione doctrinaque praepollens Palamedes proditionis damnatur, virtute Martia praepotenti praefertur Vlixes modicus Aiaci maximo. Quale autem et illud iudicium apud legiferos Athenienses catos illos et omnis scientiae magistros?

[33] Why then do you marvel, most vile heads, nay forensic cattle, nay in truth toga‑clad vultures, if judges now wholesale their rulings for a price, since at the beginning of things the case contested between gods and men was corrupted by favor, and a rustic judge and shepherd, chosen by the counsels of great Jove, sold the original sentence for the profit of lust—even with the total ruin of his own stock? So, by Hercules, also another and subsequent judgment, held among the renowned leaders of the Achaeans, in which by false imputations Palamedes, preeminent in erudition and doctrine, is condemned of treason; Ulysses, moderate, is preferred to Ajax the Greater, though very puissant in martial virtue. And what of that judgment among the law‑bearing Athenians, those shrewd men and masters of every science?

Nonne divinae prudentiae senex, quem sapientia praetulit cunctis mortalibus deus Delphicus, fraude et invidia nequissimae factionis circumventus velut corruptor adulescentiae, quam frenis cohercebat, herbae pestilentis suco noxio peremptus est relinquens civibus ignominiae perpetuae maculam, cum nunc etiam egregii philosophi sectam eius sanctissimam praeoptent et summo beatitudinis studio iurent in ipsius nomen? Sed nequis indignationis meae reprehendat impetum secum sic reputans: "Ecce nunc patiemur philosophantem nobis asinum?", rursus, unde decessi, revertar ad fabulam.

Did not the old man of divine prudence, whom the Delphic god by his wisdom preferred before all mortals, having been hemmed in by the fraud and envy of a most nefarious faction, as though a corrupter of youth—which he was restraining with reins—perish by the noxious juice of a pestilential herb, leaving to his fellow citizens a stain of perpetual ignominy, since even now distinguished philosophers prefer his most holy sect and with the highest zeal for beatitude swear by his very name? But lest anyone blame the rush of my indignation, thus reasoning with himself: "Behold, are we now to endure a donkey philosophizing for us?", again, whence I departed, I shall return to the fable.

[34] Postquam finitum est illud Paridis iudicium, Iuno quidem cum Minerva tristes et iratis similes e scaena redeunt, indignationem repulsae gestibus professae, Venus vero gaudens et hilaris laetitiam suam saltando toto cum choro professa est. Tunc de summo montis cacumine per quandam latentem fistulam in excelsum prorumpit vino crocus diluta sparsique deflens pascentis circa capellas odoro perpluit imbre, donec in meliorem maculatae speciem canitiem propriam luteo colore mutarent. Iamque tota suae fraglante cavea montem illum ligneum terrae vorago decepit.

[34] After that judgment of Paris was finished, Juno indeed with Minerva, sad and resembling the angry, return from the scene, proclaiming by gestures their indignation at the rejection; but Venus, rejoicing and cheerful, proclaimed her gladness by dancing with the whole chorus. Then, from the very summit of the mountain’s peak, through a certain hidden pipe, there burst forth on high crocus diluted with wine, and, sprinkling, it drenched with a fragrant shower the spectators around the tiers, until they changed their own mottled hoariness into a better appearance with yellow color. And now, with its whole auditorium fragrant, an earth-chasm swallowed that wooden mountain.

Ecce quidam miles per mediam plateam dirigit cursum petiturus iam populo postulante illam de puplico carcere mulierem, quam dixi propter multiforme scelus bestis esse damnatam meisque praeclaris nuptiis destinatam. Et iam torus genialis scilicet noster futurus accuratissime disternebatur lectus Indica testudine perlucidus, plumea congerie tumidis, veste serica floribus. At ego praeter pudorem obeundi publice concubitus, praeter contagium scelerae pollutaeque feminae, metu iam mortis maxime cruciabar sic ipse mecum reputans, quod in amplexus Venerio scilicet nobis cohaerentibus, quaecumque ad exitium mulieris bestia fuisset immissa, non adeo vel prudentia sollers vel artificio docta vel absistentia frugi posset provenire, ut adiacentem lateri meo laceraret mulierem, mihi vero quasi indemnato et innoxio parceret.

Behold, a certain soldier through the middle of the street directs his course, to fetch—now with the people demanding it—that woman from the public prison, whom I said, on account of multiform crime, had been condemned to the beasts and assigned to my illustrious nuptials. And already the nuptial couch—ours, to be, of course—was being most carefully spread: the bed translucent with Indian tortoise-shell, swelling with a heap of feathers, with a silken coverlet of flowers. But I, besides the shame of performing sexual intercourse publicly, besides the contagion of a criminal and polluted woman, was now most grievously tormented by fear of death, reasoning thus with myself: that, in the Venereal embrace, with us, to be sure, clinging together, whatever beast had been let in for the woman’s destruction could not so turn out—either shrewd by prudence, or taught by artifice, or by frugal abstinence restrained—as to lacerate the woman lying next to my side, yet spare me as if uncondemned and innoxious.

[35] Ergo igitur non de pudore iam, sed de salute ipsa sollicitus, dum magister meus lectulos probe coaptando districtus inseruit et tota familia partim ministerio venationis occupata partim voluptario spectaculo adtonita meis cogitationibus liberum tribuebatur arbitrium, nec magnoque quisquam custodiendum tam mansuetum putabat asinum, paulatim furtivum pedem proferens portam, quae proxima est, potitus iam cursu memet celerrimo proripio Cenchreas pervado, quod oppidum audit quidem nobilissimae coloniae Corinthiensium, adluitur autem Aegaeo et Saronico mari. Inibi portus etiam tutissimum navium receptaculum magno frequentatur populo. Vitatis ergo turbulis et electo secreto litore prope ipsa fluctuum aspergines in quodam mollissimo harenae gremio lassum corpus porrectus refovero.

[35] Therefore, then, anxious now not about modesty but about safety itself, while my master, engrossed in properly fitting together the little couches, was busied, and the whole household, partly occupied with the ministry of the hunt, partly astonished by the voluptuary spectacle, granted me free discretion for my own thoughts; and no one thought that so meek an ass needed much guarding. Little by little putting forth a furtive foot, having gained the nearest gate, I tear myself away at the swiftest run and make my way to Cenchreae, which town is reckoned to the most noble colony of the Corinthians, and is washed by the Aegean and Saronic sea. There the harbor too, a most safe receptacle of ships, is frequented by a great populace. Avoiding therefore the disturbances and choosing a secluded shore, close to the very sprinklings of the waves, in a certain most soft bosom of sand, stretched out, I restore my weary body.

Nam et ultimam diei metam curriculum solis deflexerat et vespertinae me quieti traditum dulcis somnus oppresserat.

For even the course of the sun had turned aside to the final goal of the day, and sweet sleep had overpowered me, delivered to evening rest.